079. - Chris Black & Jason Stewart

All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week, Jason. Does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place. All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcast. or watch on YouTube. Want to make a podcast? Spotify's got a platform that lets you make one super easily, then distribute it everywhere, and even earn money. We like that. All in one place for totally free. It's called Spotify for Podcasters. And here's how it works. Spotify for podcasters lets you record and edit podcasts right from your cellular telephone or your computer. So no matter what your setup is like, you can start creating today. Then you can distribute your podcast to Spotify and everywhere else. Those other places that podcasts are heard. Video podcasts are also available on Spotify. And when you want to take conversations with your fans to the next level, Q and A's and polls are the best way to get them talking. With Spotify for podcasters, you can earn money in a variety of ways, including ads and and podcast subscriptions. And best of all, it's totally free. Zero catch. We've been using it ever since we started How Long Gone. And ever since I discovered Spotify for Podcasters, I feel like having the option of turning off the Q&As and the polls on the user dashboard has really helped boost my creativity and take it to another level. I highly recommend giving it a try. Download the Spotify for Podcasters app or go to www.spotify.com slash podcasters to get started.

Yep, it's just me surrounded by nature and it feels pretty good. Feels good? I mean, you're not, you know, we're recording this episode live from the lake house. Chris is not really a big outdoor cat. You're more of an urban sprawl, minimalist guy. I'm more of an urban sprawl minimalist guy, but I think for a quick 36-hour jaunt, I can be a man of the woods. Yeah, I mean, I think you finally are appreciating the nature, the clean air, and all of the things to take white guy Instagram story pictures of. yeah maybe i am i mean it's mainly the clean air and i like being weighted on hand and foot by you that's my favorite part yeah when i mean i i wait on you hand and foot just on a daily basis but you wait on me hand and foot on a life on a lifely basis don't you i i see yeah i would agree that i'm of course as usual doing most of the heavy lifting in this relationship but You know, having a personal chef at an A-frame is nice. I feel like this is the best way to do it. I know, and I'm apologizing now that there isn't cable TV set up here. I know that was in your rider. I was honestly shocked. I assume that that feels like a lake house staple and something we should take up with the owners. yeah i think i think we might get in trouble with the association if we don't have fox news exactly yeah exactly if you don't have fox news there's going to be a little bit of a fine um it's just kind of part of the process well yeah we're up here for your birthday we had a We had a sustainable birthday cake. Chris, you had a birthday lives matter cake set up. You thought the cake was going to be a little too dense for your small frame and digestive system, but it ended up being actually kind of light and fluffy, didn't it, Chris? Yeah, it was very light and fluffy. Alex picked up the cake from Sweet Lady Jane. Sweet Lady Jane. It's the bakery right next door to Cookies on Melrose.

You already know. So when you're picking up the pack, you can pick up the other pack. You know what I'm saying? But yeah, the cake was light. It had fruit involved, so it felt healthy, I would say, almost. Yeah, healthy. But it was good. The cake was good. And you made the famous Alison Roman shallot pasta, but gluten-free, to keep it light. Yeah, I mean, it's been a real pellicula over here in the lake, my friend. And that pasta hit like hell. I was very impressed. Good. Shout-outs to Big Dog Roman. Big Dog, yeah. Roman... I can't think of a funny Polanski pasta pun. Polanski pasta. That's the new wave. Yeah, who's more canceled? Roman Polanski or Allison Roman? Am I right? interesting i but i but the pasta was delicious and and there was some tartine garlic bread as well because i felt like being a bad boy you know what else was delicious the cinematography of roman polanski i know you're a real cinephile jason um but you know we did watch some tv while we were here um we watched we watched one show called the home edit that literally is the worst television show i've ever it might be the worst reality-based television show i've ever seen in my entire life yeah it is a show the episode one the hero character was was a reese witherspoon uh appearance where these shitty southern women go to your house and and spend 45 minutes reorganizing your closet and then You pay them $18,000, and then you come in and say, oh, my God. You put all of my shirts in a box, and then you wrote shirts on the box with a label. It's the kind of chicks that have, like, signs from Michaels with cursive writing in their laundry room. And that's not a shot at my own mother because she does have that. But I'm just trying to illustrate the point. What kind of signage is happening at the Black Estate?

a handful of um you know reclaimed wood style cursive writing like live laugh love wine me you know it's five o'clock somewhere type of signage but it's a little more uh a little more pg maybe and a little more cute okay so like if you if you were if you if you were closer to the ocean it would be like beach this way yeah exactly yeah exactly those are some of my favorite signs yeah i love directions um but those yeah that that kind of signage but the home edit i i imagine reese witherspoon is the executive producer or her production company must be involved but man do not watch that yeah do not i mean the previews are tempting and you know we love a fixer-upper show we love a reveal you know queer eye in japan with my girl kiko there's there's a lot of good stuff to be had in that genre on netflix but but goners please stay away from the home edit the home edit was yeah it was tough but then we also watched something that jason had hyped up hella hyped up for me called what's it called the the social dilemma well i'm not the only one hyping it's it's what everyone is talking about yeah bob left set sent out a 2000 word email about it last night i didn't have time to read it because i was too busy enjoying the woods but um i was able to i was able to read it it was a little boring it wasn't hitting like some other bobby bobby l classic well i it's basically a show with a bunch of fucking high-paid dorks that have left their jobs and now are complaining about social media was that is that how you would sum it up well i wouldn't call it a show i would call it a life-altering documentary an expose if you will yeah it was an expose it was about you know obviously the the the dilemmas of social media and what it's done to the mental health of our children you know like All the, like the current, like you and I, you know, people in our 40s are part of the last generation. Don't do that. Don't do that. Go ahead. But, you know, joking aside, our generation is the last one where we had truly one foot evenly and evenly distributed in both worlds of pre and post social media. And everyone now, like you are basically, you know, you're 12 years old.

And you have an Instagram. You're six years old and you have an Instagram. And that's all you know. And what that does to your brain is a bad, bad thing. I think they made some good points, but the whole thing was pretty dorky and didn't make me feel like changing my habits. I don't know about you. It made me feel like changing some of my habits. I knew that it would not affect you at all because nobody likes to have the mirror turned on themselves. You're the kind of fella who needs to see it the most, perhaps. I mean, not the most, but... It would be recommended viewing for me. I would agree. It has all that negative stuff about how suicide rates are up and kids nowadays are... They're getting in less and less relationships. They are taking less life risks. They don't care about getting their driver's license anymore. They don't care about exploring or being adventurous or experiencing things in life that build the character and make you not a cuck person. The cuck life is perpetuating more and more every day. Well, I mean, who needs any of those things? You can do them all online. You know what I mean? I see the point for these kids. I think they're doing the right thing. You know what I mean? Stay inside. What kind of risks are you taking online, Chris? I'm kidding. I do think kids should go outside and shit, but I also don't know what world. I mean, this is the world they're living in now. They might be better served, to be honest, because you have to understand this advice is coming from old heads. Yeah. I see both sides is what I'm saying. But you're able to see both sides because you know what both sides are like. And you're able to separate the good from the bad and the healthy from the unhealthy, whereas other people are truly unable to control themselves. So you're saying if I spend too much time on a lot, I'm going to believe that 5G calls COVID, the earth is flat.

Bush did 9-11, etc. No, basically it explores how artificial intelligence and machine learning kind of knows the exact perfect formula to keep your eyeballs looking at your phone or your computer screen for as long as possible to serve you these ads. A lot of people nowadays, conspiracy theories, which is something that you would think or i guess back in the day would try to be more hidden online is now being used as like a full like marketable demographic of millions and millions of millions of people of like this is how we get you know this is how we get everyone's crazy aunt on on facebook for 12 hours a day and it's you know kitten videos weren't hitting well enough and now it has to be you know queuing on pizzagate shit or whatever it might be or that happened to me so it's propaganda a scene in the movie where it's the guy from righteous gemstones if you remember um he's playing a a teenager who is kind of reenacting getting getting radicalized from from the youtube algorithm and i will say that that has happened to me where i can't put down my phone and stop watching videos but it's just the chiropractor stuff so i feel like i'm i feel like i've missed appointments and social gatherings to watch more of those videos but it hasn't caused me any actual problems yet your mom is like chris it's time for you to go to work and you know open your macbook air and look at tweets and then you're like boom and um yeah well do you when you're watching your chiropractor videos on youtube do you click the next recommended video uh not usually i like to skip around and and sample different flavors but i'll watch five or six from one chiro and then keep it pressing depending on how i'm feeling Okay, because they were saying that's one of the biggest things you can do to help keep your pure algorithm more pure is to not click on anything recommended, any clickbait stuff. You just watch this cooking video, now watch this cooking video. Don't do any of that because that's how they capture more data and information about you and then serve you them ads in the algorithm. Big data is what you're saying.

i don't watch i don't really use youtube that much though you know what i mean i feel like you do uh not that much actually but i mean that that's the beauty of it there's you know for every every person who doesn't like chiropractor videos or youtube you know we have we have instagram we have tumblr we have pinterest we have you know whatever boring ass sites you know all of your nowness vids and all that that was my problem that was my problem with the whole thing though is it literally the only interviews were with guys who'd clearly made millions and millions of dollars in this exact industry and then at some point decided it was bad and now are getting paid to talk about it being bad it's just a little bit like i i mean i think they're right about most of it but that's a little fishy to me Yeah, but I mean, those are also the people whose words we take and carry the most weight out of anyone. When you're hearing a political whistleblowing book or crazy article being released, you don't want to hear information from them unless they were on the front lines. You don't want to hear about Steve Bannon unless Steve Bannon was really in there pulling some strings. Well, that's the issue with a lot of this stuff is that they know all this information obviously while they're still getting a check and then only distribute the information when the check stops. So it's less whistleblower, more tattletale to me. Yeah, but these people really believe that they're tattletaling because it's the future of our human race at stake. And also a lot of people can use the excuse of like, we didn't know this was going to turn into all of this. And they may or may not. There's truth to both sides of that. But, you know, as the machine learning and the AI keeps becoming more and more intelligent and knowing us and knowing our data and all that stuff. They may have truly not known it was going to turn into this. They thought it was just going to stop at like, oh, you like this sweater on Essence, then we're going to hit you with the little ad when you're looking at your New Yorker the next day, and that's about it. They didn't know I was going to get this deep into controlling political elections. Yeah, that's true. Really fucking the world up.

And once again, I think the moral of the story is here, never underestimate the stupidity of the American people, which is a reoccurring theme on this podcast hosted by two idiots. Yeah, but also it's worldwide. It happened in Russia, it's happening in Brazil, it's happening in China, it's happening in America. Every race, Myanmar, it's all fucked up because of Facebook. So if you're listening to this, you've got to delete Facebook off top, even though Instagram is just Facebook for cool people. I use Facebook every day because I keep it real, but I understand that some people like to delete it. What does keeping it real mean to you? No, I don't look at it every day, but I do click through it at least a couple times a week just to see what's popping. What is the Facebook scene report? I deleted Facebook years ago, and I really don't know what is popping on it. Not much. Whenever something really pops off on Facebook, some people will share it on Twitter. This is the most viewed video in America right now. Damn, look how fucked up it is. I just saw one today where it was somebody doing the trick where you fold a $[redacted address] and it turns the presidential bust and the picture of the Washington Monument or whatever it is. You fold it in the right little origami thing and it turns into the Twin Towers being blown up by an airplane. a classic and that and like currently right now on this day september 13th 2020 that is like the most viewed video on facebook like something that somebody made 15 years ago and that's exactly why that's exactly why i look at facebook jason because again it's like going to the mall you got to see how the regular folks are living It's important to stay in touch with the regular folks. And so you don't get into your hashtag silo. And they talked about that on the documentary. It's important to follow people that you disagree with just so you know what's going on in the world. Is that why I see you liking so many Candace Owens photos on Instagram? Or is that something you don't want to talk about? No, no, no. I just look at the accounts I disagree with. I don't double tap. Only Yayo would do something like that.

That's a good point. I thought the documentary was interesting. I don't think it's as mind-blowing. I mean, it's all stuff you kind of know, but it's just told to you by these fucking dorks who had jobs at the same places. So it definitely feels a little more realistic. And the information is definitely good. It's definitely real info. But it has to be a documentary, and it has to be compelling, and it has to be on Netflix for it to really move the needle for people to absorb that info. More importantly, Netflix released, I think, the entire Girlfriends catalog. I never caught Girlfriends. Girlfriends is big fire. I'm a big Tracee Ellis Ross head. Huge fan of hers. What do you like about her? She's funny and smart and hot and she dresses cool. I just like her. She's the one who looks like a bird, right? Yeah, your sister. Okay, so you think she's hot? That's cool. I do think she's hot, yeah. She is funny from what I hear, but I don't think I've ever really checked anything out from her. Girlfriends is also just a classic. The big twist of Girlfriends that most people know is that Kelsey Grammer was the executive producer and co-creator. That shit was big. That was a big show. It was on TV for a very long time. Kelsey keeps it all the way 100 with it. Kelsey keeps it 100 with it. Girlfriends, the entire collection hitting Netflix is more important than this little dork Facebook documentary. But you choose your own battles out there, listeners. I'm going to go ahead and do a big disagree. The one thing I did take from it is protecting your own algorithm is going to become more beneficial and necessary in the future. I think it could be... You know, like the new credit score or something like that is like what is your, you know, it's like the true marker of where your head is at, like how clean you're keeping your nose, so to speak. You know, really looking at all that info, you know, kind of how China is doing where they're just giving people like a life score by how like good or bad of a person they are based on, you know, a thousand data points. You wouldn't do very well with that, but I understand.

I mean, that's the thing. I think my algo is pretty clean. Other than checking out my graph vids, that'll knock my score down a couple clicks. My algo is literally like cat power on a British late night show and a chiropractor video, maybe a skate video. um and then and then like some dumb shit you you send me to like teach me how to use some equipment i don't need that's that's basically the the entirety of my youtube usage okay well i guess we you know thank god our algo is clean and if you want to you know if you want to buy some clean algo piss just hit my hit bang jason's cap app cash app for that clean clean algo piss that's so stupid so chris you know you you are a social media monster right now we all know it that's why we listen to this podcast just to see you know a peek into the mind of the golden state scroller chris black damn did you come off is that off dome or did you write that down that's off dome i put it on my mama that's off dome but i i did put a little little rum in my in my coffee so tj got bars for the next 40 minutes damn damn fuck it was making me think you know since you are the golden state scroller what and and you started getting onto social media when you were a a fully developed adult like you were in your 20s when you know when instagram and twitter was popping off what do you think you would be doing what would your life look like what would your personality be if you like we're on Instagram from eight years old, say. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Squarespace. Obviously, Jason, you and I spend a lot of time on the World Wide Web, so do all our peers, our listeners, our friends, our colleagues, maybe even your parents if they're freaky. And if you're doing anything in the world, writing, taking pictures. I do topless boxing. You need a website. Exactly, a website that works, that does what it's supposed to do, that allows you to be creative but also business-minded.

Jason, there's one place to go for that, Squarespace. Yeah, Chris, I'm over here. I'm modifying calculators and putting Claude inside of them so you could cheat at school. And I just want a place where I could have everything all in one place. I can have the SEO tools so those future graduates can find me. And I'm able to accept, quote unquote, donations for my services that might be gray area. You know what I mean? And then email campaigns. Hey, I got a new 2.3 version upgrade. Boom, boom, boom. Get the analytics going. Raise some money. Show your investor all of your cool analytics of what's going on. They're going to want to get in early. And we can use Blueprint AI to make your website look as professional as your competition, if not more. So head to squarespace.com slash howlong for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code howlong to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian stateside with Kai and Carter. This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's trying to slow down. The news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world. And I know you particularly have quite a lot of questions. A lot of questions, but how often? Because we do this podcast three times a week and that's a sweet spot. How many times do they do? Three times a week. And I have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points that they're maybe going to be covering different stuff than we do. That's just a guess. The Guardian is not some billionaire owned. They're not afraid to say what they want to say, brother. Yeah, Rupert ain't sniffing around in what journalists Kai Wright and Carter Sherman are up to over there at Stateside. But yeah, listen wherever you get your podcasts. You can watch it on YouTube. It's three times a week. And who couldn't use more news? You know, especially when it's not, you know, from here, let's say. Give it a listen. Give it a listen. All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Quince.

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likes is a problem and that that is true for adults and children alike but i think it's it affects children more obviously because they're underdeveloped brains but i mean yeah we we as humans are not meant to be they were saying like they're not we're not meant to be able to process what 10 000 people think about you at any given moment who don't have any compassion for what they're about to tell you just like You know, if you read any YouTube comment of like, look at this ugly ass fat bitch, kill yourself. Like, you know, humans are not supposed to hear that. You know, I could see that. And, you know, if you catch me simping, I might get into my feelings a little bit. But if I was, you know, 13 year old TJ, draw the curtains. It's going to be a long, it's going to be a long December. TJ would have been a school shooter is what you're saying. Yeah. Yeah, you strike me as a little Columbine head ass with this little let it spray attitude. But, I mean, I do think that... The problem is the trench coat for my 6ix9ine ass is just looking like a... Damn, that's a good point. You couldn't even hide the strap in there very well. It barely covers this pog ass. i don't know oh my god i don't know i don't know what i don't know what it would be like but we i had social media like but i guess we had aol and that and the chat rooms and stuff but that was one-on-one do you know i mean that wasn't necessarily like a group think where people could see you getting roasted by your mates like in real time yeah i mean it did get it got lit in the chat room sometimes but yeah but the chat room again it's it's fleeting it's not the same it's not the same thing it's not like all your buddies at school are like i saw what you know what i mean that's that's it was yeah yeah and there's no there's you know it's not it's not set in stone forever there's no screenshots there's no you know any of that stuff somebody will just make fun of you and then that's it that should keep scrolling but i mean i do i wonder i mean i would definitely be a monster more than i am now which is tough to consider yeah you are a motherfucking monster and

You know, that's why we listen to this podcast because it is like, you know, going to a zoo and seeing, you know, we need to see what a caged animal looks like. This cage is luxurious, baby. So how do you feel about Wimbledon right now? Wimbledon is... You mean the U.S. Open? The U.S. Open, sorry, sorry. U.S. Open done got turned on its head. i know it's pretty crazy i mean i i i think we'll be able to catch it today if we leave in time after we finish this annoying podcast um my guy you know shop of all of my favorite canadian who looks like he's a hockey player he's out you know um i i kind of don't i kind of don't care honestly but like i watch all finals because i was talking more i guess you know naomi osaka winning what you know my man corday courtside courtside corday YB in courtside is very fucking cool. The video of him almost getting into the fucking album cover pose instead of an appropriate handshake with the winner of the US Open. Actually, they're a very cool couple, and I can see a lot of editorials coming their way after this victory. very cool couple i never was really checking for for ybn courtside at all i just assumed that his music was bad and he still watches spongebob and his mommy makes him macaroni and cheese but he seems like a good guy actually so far i mean i think all of that stuff could be true um but he's just got a cool girlfriend and he's gonna maybe ride those coattails yeah i mean it's hard for me to listen to rap music from about killing people who are definitely not killers but the victory is good for her i mean i'm a little i'm not a big serena fan even though like she's the greatest of all time i find her a little obnoxious is she the beyonce of tennis i mean i i think she's like i mean she's like the greatest of all time what can you really say but i find her i don't know i just don't find her that i think osaka is a more like of the times champion and and it feels like more appropriate yeah you know serena been doing it for a long time you know yeah no serena's yeah she's been doing it and like i i just kind of forgot how amazing a tennis she is because her pivot to like mom who married the dork who founded reddit is just like the opposite of cool whereas no me dating fucking yb and corday is very cool hey you know beyonce married an old dork rich dork too

That's a good point. That's a good point. All dusty ass bars. You're right. It's cool. But Serena was the first person to crip walk on the court. That's also a good point. She also wore the off-white uni. Let's never forget that. You know, your favorites weren't doing that, Jason. I was reading today. more people are moving out of california than they are moving into california for the first time in in over 10 years these fires just motherfucking started last week but i don't know if it's i don't think it's from the fires i think it's more of a covet thing of people wanting to leave leave the city i just don't where especially in the west coast where are you gonna go everything's hell except la san francisco is literally a shooting gallery like we're gonna go arizona las vegas like Portland? I think people are going to Arizona. I think people are going to Utah a lot. Not so much Oregon right now unless you get hired by Nike to be a fucking loser. It's a lot of Sedona, Arizona. It's like Zion, Utah shit, Montana. Texas. A lot of Texas. all of that shit is cool in theory but i think you're going to look up in a year and a half two years three years and be like what the fuck did i do why am i living out like that's that's not it's not sustainable for most people i i don't think unless unless you are you know betting on the fact that this is just going to be how it is forever Or it's only even going to get worse and worse. I mean, and I do understand taking that bet. I just think that people are, I just think it's a lot of knee-jerk reactions. And also like, I mean, look, I guess maybe it's also the no confidence in leadership of your state and city. Is it maybe probably pushing people out as well? Well, you know, as a real estate tycoon myself, I'm into sniffing out trends. And, you know, I'm just saying I've got my eye on this. So where do you think realtor TJ is looking to cop up next? You know... What's the hottest emerging market on the West Coast, TJ? I think I might go Ventura. It's not super new, but I think for the next 10 years, it might be the last great little enclave. How far is that from LA? I'd say it's like 45 minutes.

That's where Patagonia is, right? I think so, yeah. So what goes down there, like surfing bros? Yeah, it's just very laid-back surfing bro vibes. It's sort of untouched by the last 20 years. But it's starting to turn right now, and I think the only problem that it really has is it's only filled with white people who are retired, and they're chill, and they're cool, and they're liberal-ish, but they're also still, you know. you know they're trumping they're trumping on the low just a bit uh what do they have an air one or like a sprouts what's the vibe might have an air one i mean they definitely have a tesla supercharging station they definitely have a whole foods i mean it is nice like it's a it's a very like quaint cute little surf community that is but it's considered is it considered like a beach town yeah it's a beach town but that's my move or otherwise maybe you know like kind of by where we are in Lake Arrowhead, like San Bernardino area. I thought San Bernardino was torched as fuck. It was torched for a long-ass time, but now everything changes. Now that we don't see each other, go outside, look at people, do anything, it might start getting kind of nice. Damn, I like this. I think TJ's real estate scene report could be an interesting feature of this podcast. All I'm looking for is just a little working capital and we can start making some big moves, Chris. What do you say? I mean, I love big moves. You know that. But I could never see myself located outside of a major city. I just think it's a terrible way to live. I couldn't do it. I know, I know. But you will eventually retire. And you will eventually, when New York is gone, are you going to go to Jersey? No, bitch, you retired to the Upper East Side from downtown. That's exactly what you do. But what happens when Manhattan, let's say you can't live in New York City City. Are you going to Connecticut? Are you going upstate? Miami, baby. Great, perfect answer. You know I'm a snowbird. You know what I'm saying? Honestly, I love Miami. I've always loved it. I could do a Key Biscayne to ride out my later years. You're a bisky boy. I wouldn't go that far, but yeah, okay.

yeah so you so you i mean i was asking because i just i was just watching the the trailer for nomad land which is like a movie that everyone is is nutting about right now jason not only is hot on the on the real estate tips but jason's also now obviously film hive i didn't know you worked in the industry but he's keeping up with the the winners and losers at the festival for during festival season and and this film nomad is nomad people is what it's called yeah nomad land just follow Letterboxd.com backslash them jeans if you want. I follow the real trade papers, Variety, Hollywood Reporter, Deadline, The Ankler, a popular newsletter for the Hollywood industry. You're a Deadline whore, aren't you? I mean, it's not what it used to be, but I like to get my industry news from industry players. You know what I mean? Not interlopers like you. Guys who just live in a physical proximity to the business but don't live in the business, if you know what I'm saying. Okay, you sound like a fucking boomer makeup artist right now. Well, I do have a Fenty collection dropping next month. Bro, you wasn't there with me at the Waterworld premiere, bitch. You weren't, dude. You weren't. You wasn't there with me at Planet Holly. Tell me about me and Jean-Claude Van Damme signing t-shirts in 1997. Claudia Schiffer was there too. I'm holding Dr. Ruth like a baby. This is real 1989 shit. Tell me about this, Dr. Ruth. Tell me about it. It's the god, Francis McDermott, who is just a nomad. It's covering the lifestyle of... modern nomadic american people i guess of just like we're not homeless we're not crazy we just we just want to live you know live freely we you know rv culture you just pick up and go you have and then you have like little friends that you kick it with and weird little campfire communities this is this is like a so my so one of my best friends growing up who was the uh the drummer in cartel kevin his his parents do this now

like they're both just retired and they bought a crazy rv that was like it's super expensive and really nice and they just like yeah that's it they just drive around they converted the sprinter exactly they drive around they still own their house and stuff but they just they're not there and this is what they do i you know i think that that particular lifestyle is going to go is going to go dummy in the next five ten years probably well i mean you know there's a there's a big demand for like a lot of people are turning their mercedes sprinter and like to the livable you know cost a couple hundred thousand dollars but you get it fully outfitted with a shower and a kitchen and the whole thing my friend another friend of mine um a photographer from from here um who well he lived in la but he's from atlanta he did that he's currently doing that he said the demand is really high he could he because he outfitted his himself with his dad and he a big profit right now damn he he flipped a sprinter he flipped a sprinter but he but i mean same thing that's what that's what toby campion is doing right now too he bought one of these sprinters fully outfitted that seems like a lot of money though like you can buy a house in st louis for that same amount of money but that's but that's what i'm telling you i'm i'm saying that you're right because the value like they're they're in demand they're in demand like the value they hold their value is that is that a lifestyle that you find attractive at all no what's fuck out of here like i want to take a shower i want to have a smoothie i mean i guess i think the only way i could i could do it if there was like an exercise component like if it was like a two-week like run across america or some shit and i lived in the sprinter on the way and there was like a reason for it but just doing that to do it i i don't understand like What are you escaping? If that's what you're going to do for the rest of your life, then okay. But you're going to do this for a year and then have to go buy a house and do all this shit over again? What is the point? I mean, what are you escaping is the real question at hand, Chris. It is a good one. And I think that's the interesting part of how those people are looked down upon in society as something wrong with them or something might not necessarily be wrong with them. They're just that type of person.

Back in the day, a nomadic culture was very normal, and now you are looked at like a full maniac, if that's what you're doing. Hopefully, nomadic vibes only becomes normalized. I don't think it's crazy at all. I understand the appeal of it. It just doesn't do shit for me, because I'm a person who likes to be comfortable and do things that are... routine based you know you're blessed so like feel grateful that you're able to feel comfortable just you know living in the city well you know as the world crumbles i want to be in a major metropolitan area just to feel it really in every every pore and and crevice of my body um you know if i was out in that chopped cheese exactly if i was in zion national park right now i wouldn't be feeling shit you know what i mean so like boring um but the nature the back to nature shit is going to help city dwellers like us tj yeah man i'm with it it's gonna weed out all the it's gonna weed out all the pussies that love stars and clean air and shit and it's just gonna be you and i left soaking up all the real estate and good food fuck yeah man i mean I'm definitely going to get into fishing culture very soon. I feel that that is my next thought. You're already late on gawping, but go for it. I'm not late on gawping. I mean, you know, the word gawp, that is just like, you know, people that dress up in Patagonia who, you know, just for fun. Is that the vibe? That's literally you, but continue. But, I mean. You're wearing a vintage North Face fleece right now. Okay. But there's no negative connotation to a gorp, is there? Or is that somebody who's wearing this clothing as a performative act? Is there no derogatory or pejorative attached to it? I think among real outdoorsmen, you would be considered a fucking valor stealer.

I don't know if that's true because I almost became an Eagle Scout. I know how to tie all kind of knots. I know how to chop shit. I know how to fish and kill skin a fucking animal and shit. You don't know how to do anything. You can cook and you can talk and you can blast cigs. What else can you do? Bro, I made a damn dog leash out of some rope and you were looking at me like I just cured cancer. That was impressive. I will say I could not have done that. I'm really, really, really, really worthless with stuff like that. So being a Gort man, that's not being a poser. Or it is. It feels posery. It feels posery. I'm not totally sure. But there's no criteria to be judged on. Are you an outdoors person? What do you have to do to be able to pass the test? I think I would say we could make up our own list right now. I think you should have to camp eight times a year minimum. Okay, and there can be no indoor rock climbing. It only has to be outdoor rock climbing. Indoor rock climbing is definitely a trend that I haven't tried it yet. A few friends and fans of the show have offered to take me. I guess I never thought about what the quarantine effect on our indoor rock climbing hive. Everyone check on your indoor climbers. Yeah, their chalk bags are empty and they're feeling the burn. Yeah, the Sportivas, we hung up our heels. Exactly. I mean, I know that I see my friend Taka that I work with at Valence. He's a big climber, and he's getting it in, but that's in Canada where things are a little looser right now. So I am concerned about that, and I do think that outdoor rock climbing is obviously a lot more dangerous and scary, and that's why those pussies in their little bag stay inside. Yeah, if you're going to be climbing, it has to be outdoors, and you can't have one of those.

loser safety ropes to to help if you fall like come on bro do do does it look am i where am i doing bumper bowling no yeah like get out there and let it fly do i have training wheels on the fucking fixed gear fam no i don't yo yo this this rari don't i mean i paddle shift you know what i'm saying but but did chris opt out on the paddle shifters when he had the mozzie no no no No, we don't do that. Does Chris know what a paddle shifter is? No, no, no. Yeah, exactly. I just know I'm supposed to use it. But I do think the criteria, I mean, like, for example, I would never camp. I would never fish. I have no interest in fishing. I don't really even like to walk outside. You know what I mean? Like, you know, we did a little walk this morning, and because there are beautiful homes, I killed an hour and it was fine. But, you know, if I was just looking at nature, it's like what put me inside. put me into inside yeah when you are in la and you're running around like everyone's like i'm gonna go hit the beach i'm gonna go to griffith park i'm gonna go you know hit the the riverbed and chris is like i'm gonna hit melrose i'm gonna hit la brea and i'm gonna hit fairfax if i'm gonna run because i need to see funny people to look at who are riding those little scooters that have the speakers built into them Exactly. But I will say that I have a bunch of friends. A lot of the guys that work at Stussy in Vancouver are really on their outdoor shit. They have crazy cars that you can drive in the water and shit. They're really on some wild. And it looks so beautiful. It looks crazy, the places they are. The Kia is amphibious. Please believe. The Kia breathed through his fibs. But I think I do see the outdoor trend is being co-opted by influencer content creator losers and it's creating a sub genre of content that i'm really starting to hate that people are really loving which is like hot guys who like live in their van and then make videos of them like making coffee over the fire shirtless and everyone is like damn how are they freaking doing that and then like i'm gonna cut this like piece of chicken with my like giant machete sword and then cook it

on like a cast iron over the fire and then make like a high def video of it it feels like your your algorithm is actually fucked up because i'm not seeing any of this content it's it's a real thing you know goner sound off in the sound off in the comments if you're if you feel me but it is a real and it's like look at me i'm going to make i'm going to make a a french press coffee outdoors like i feel like that is sort of the only reason why people are going camping or glamping or any type of outdoor thing they're not just going you know because they like it they're going there so they can buy you know much like the mindset of a cb so they could buy all the gear and then take a like a video of them you know making food in like a big cast iron pot like i'm gonna make some some campfire beans by the pot and then yes i also brought some eric warheim wine and then We're going to have a millennial cannabis brand CBD thing. This literally sounds like an activation that you've made a deck for. It is. But that's why I'm so salty is because TJ was on this wave on the keynote a year and a half, two years ago. And now, thanks to the novel coronavirus, all of my ideas... have been figured out by regular people who don't have galaxy brains like myself when I'm in the Google Slides. I hate when normies steal my ideas. It's a real problem. But luckily, Jason, we're an idea factory. We can shit these things out. It's no problem. So you guys keep camping and taking your little pictures of chicken with your shirt off. Jason and I will be in Lake Arrowhead ideating. This chicken lays a fresh new egg every day, and it's time to scramby. It's time. God damn it. I mean, look, man, we've been here for 36 hours, 48 hours. No, it's going to be 36. I'm good. It was beautiful. I had a good time. But it's time to get back to the city. And even though it's on fire and smoky, the Peloton's indoors. Also, this is the perfect amount of time for me. I don't need to leave for any more than that. But I think we're going to have to start doing this a lot more often, getting out on the reg.

Even though we like all of those niceties, I love my house. I don't want to leave my house. I spent a long time with my LP making it that little house of home. And whenever I travel now and go to places, it's not as enjoyable as the home. I mean, if you're telling me you'd rather be home than at the rave, then I'm shocked to hear this from you. It depends on who's playing. Good point. i've watched you blossom into a goofy dj into a real man who could take care of a home and i have to say it's it's it's honestly sexy as hell and you know look you can cook you can clean you can chop you can you i mean can you change the oil on a car yeah of course i was doing that when i was 16 baby that's pretty sick never done that in my life never even attempted i can't even change a tire i'm calling triple a nobody assumed that you could chris don't worry yeah but Whatever, man. Shut up. You're a carry and you know it. Yeah, I like to think that I bring other things to the table. As I reflect on 38 Years on Earth, I feel like I'm able to bring other things to the table, and that's why I have macho friends like you to beat up my enemies and nail stuff into the wall. Yeah, man. It's the beautiful yin and yang of a long otter and his twink friend. We both bring things to the table. We can't win the war just on our own. It's all about offense and defense. You need your whole squad behind you to make these moves and really, really dominate. Look, my squad makes moves. God damn it. So are you familiar? The internet is going absolutely cuckoo bananas over this guy, Jacob Alordi. Are you familiar with this hottie? No, I am not familiar with him. What it do and what he do. I mean, he's tall and broad-chested, and apparently he was in a Netflix show called kissing booth yeah which i've never seen but it seems like he's so basically this man though apparently he smashes in dia and now he's smashing kaya gerber which is an insane insane twosome only your boy pete davidson could could handle that type of this guy's on davidson level but he's so he's been photographed a lot in new york with kaya this weekend because they're holding hands they're hitting the restaurants they're hitting dimes you know i mean they're they're at all the hot spots what do you think the chances are that

that pete was having uh underage relations with kaya oh come on of course that's the hollywood way we need to lock him up then don't we i mean look pete davidson needs to be locked up for many reasons um so i i don't i mean we can get started with that but so a lordy so there's all these paparazzi pictures of him with all these but you know and the gays are just absolutely wagging their tongues gay gay twitter is going absolutely nuts for this guy and i get it he's got his haircuts kind of bad but i see it i get does he have tiktok hair no it's like a weird kind of like i got an expensive mullet kind of oh like a little funny he's got a joe deer tay yeah but like a little bit but like an 800 you know like japanese salon version his name is jacob lordy e lordy e l o r d i but the problem with this guy i'm seeing all these paparazzi pictures everybody he's so hot blah blah blah this motherfucker is wearing golden goose deluxe brand sneakers in every picture like what the fuck we're gonna let we're gonna let that slide though like i can't let that slide in my personal life why am i gonna let it slide with celebrities every celebrity wears those shoes though okay i'm looking at him and i get it you would hit I mean, the style is not so good, but he is tall AF, and his arms are more unswold than mine. That's not making me happy. Well, that doesn't take much when you've got two twists and fingers at the bottom. Is he Australian? He kind of looks Australian. I actually don't know. I don't know his place of origin, actually. All I know is if you dig down Zendaya and Kaya, you're a legend. I mean, this guy basically looks exactly like me if I had the gooses on. Do you think the gooses come? I bet we could get you a pair of gooses in 17. Kyrie Irving definitely has the goose plug in the size 17 for your boy. I'd love to get you in some gooses just to really take you to Jones on third and see what happens. This man really has TJ fits going on, and it's bumming me out. Describe one of these fits that you think is your worst. So I'm looking right now. She's got the workout vibes. He has the New York Yankees hat on, not a fitted. He has the Patagonia fanny pack, but he's going crossbody, which TJ would never.

Then he has Nike running shorts, but he's doing a French tuck with a vintage Harley Davidson tee, and that's where he lost me. But then, you know, a regular white sock and the golden goose. If he loses the goose and then just puts on a – lose the goose, puts the patty – patty fanny around the neck instead of around jason where's his that's what you losers need to recognize that jason's wearing the patty patty fanny pack around the neck like a damn chain and that you guys yeah you can't do that you guys can't do that because it's no it's no days off we don't skip neck day what that neck do But, you know, if you switch out the shoes and you make the crossbody into a necky and then the Harley Davidson shirt just gets turned into a plain, you know, acne tee, then... Oh, God, shut up, bitch. You're wearing a Hanes-sized large tall t-shirt. Fruit of the loom. Fruit of the loom. You can't dress with us. You ain't wearing no acne. Bad man, no acne. So you're saying a Lordy could get it, you get it. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm with it. But, you know, I'm also looking at a photo. It's like a black and white picture of him where he's wearing a white tee. The sleeves are rolled up like casually. Like he didn't do it, but it just happened. He's in his little James Dean bag. The wind blew his sleeves up. Yeah, yeah. James Dean bag. Chris, you already know the photo. And, you know, he's taking his photo. With a toothpick in his mouth, of course. You're like, oh, you cut me with my normal toothpick. Remember five years ago when I was capping for toothpicks when all you guys were still brushing your teeth? It's crazy. It's crazy, bro. You've been tea tree mafia for a long time. But look, I like these young guys cooking, and again, he's putting in the work. Clearly, he must be a nice guy. He must be doing it right. Does that mean that you're going to fuck around and tune into a kissing booth available on Netflix? No, I'm sure he's got some more projects coming out there, a little more age-appropriate for me that I could check out. was he wasn't on he was on he was the hot guy in euphoria so i'm aware of this guy oh so he probably he met zendaya on set which i know that makes chris's blood boil because you're i didn't know you're such a zen man i love zendaya she bad as hell and she talented also the classic photo of them riding on the back of the golf cart in the airport

where he's holding the pelican case very cb fit it's it's too good dude i mean getting getting the paparazzi shot in the airport on the fucking the special services golf cart because you're famous is goals af goals af what you know i i do question do you think you know there was a there was a time where like the low top vans a few years ago were very popular obviously you know the plain white vans the old school the old schools or the era the era Not the old schools. No stripy. How long until those inevitably come back? I mean, I will never stop wearing those because that's a shoe I've worn since I was literally in middle school. But I don't wear them as often as I would. I think the old school to me goes in and out of flavor more often than the era. The era seems more like a staple. You're right, but I wouldn't wear them right now. But maybe in about a year and a half, they will come back. Vans makes big boy sizes for you, right? Yeah, but a lot of different shoes, once you stretch them out, it don't look right. From my Adobe heads, the constraint proportions can be manipulated to a point where it just ain't hitting right. We need the vector and we need to hit shift when we're transforming because some silhouettes on the shoe. turn out wild goofy and it's not it's not nice for tj so you're saying that that the vans just don't look they ain't they ain't hitting for you at a 17 no it just it just looks like a rolled up dish towel it's just like a long piece of fabric that has no rhyme or reason with a soul affixed to the bottom do you think i was just thinking of this earlier can we get somebody to make an instagram filter for the cutler and gross so like the cb filter I'm pretty sure we have that person in our network. If you're listening, you know how to do that. If you need the cutlerandgross.png, maybe for the 100th episode, once we want to go viral. We can release a filter. Alex got me the birthday present, the Janie corn candle that looks like me. Yeah, your bust has been forever immortalized in beeswax.

You might have seen it on the stories. I'll never burn it. It's going to sit on my mantle because nothing says success like being surrounded by imagery of yourself and your own home. Much like a king or a queen, I like to commission artists to render me. And Chris, I hope one day you get that mantle. Look, right now I've got a shelf, but you know. Well, you know what? Once you finish decorating your content creation wall where you have your Zoom set up, you definitely have to put the candle of your own bust there. Well, the problem is there's not – because of the Oscar, Emmy, and Tony, there's only like so much room on the shelf. But I'll figure it out. I mean, are there podcast awards? Have you been nominated and we just didn't know? I don't know, actually. There has to be a podcast award, yeah. I think there is. Yeah. Is there a bathroom around? Because I – I'm looking for my potty. You know what I'm saying? Oh, my God. It's the 15th annual potty. Damn, TJ gone off the edibles right now, bro. Oh, my God. I only took a halfie. It didn't even hit. I'm too hard. Jason would take edibles all day, all night. I think he's got a problem. I don't do this when I'm on office hours. We're on holiday. We're in the woods. Ain't nothing to do but cook. So I'm going to pop my rose edibles and I'm going to like it. I'm going to get gone. I'm going to drive home down the hill and it won't be safe. I'm putting two seatbelts on. Okay. Well, you know, it's been another absolutely fucking great podcast coming to you live from Lake Arrowhead where the air is clean and the water is serene. How long gone? The only podcast that matters. The best podcast on your airwaves. Them jeans, Chris Black coming to you three times a week live to tape. This ain't a fucking game. We got guests this week coming up. I'm not going to tell you who. But look, go watch that little broke boy anti-social media documentary. Go watch Girlfriends. Go check out Jacob Elordi and let me know if you let him smash. Go check out Allison Roman. She's got bomb-ass pasta. We'll see you guys next time. Bye!