855. - Lukas Gage

All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week, Jason. Does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place. All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcast. or watch on YouTube. How long gone? It is a Thursday afternoon. I'm still in Florida. Like, God himself is mad. I don't know what to do. I had to drive in it, and it was terrifying. People were turning their flashers on. Everybody here is old as fuck, so they can't be trust on the roads. I'm glad to be indoors talking to you. Okay, I'm looking at the weather right now. Precipitation, we're looking at 95. Thunder is in the area, and you do have a coastal flood warning, in effect. Hey, you know what, Jason? This is great. It's even less reason for me to leave this laptop and all of these transcripts. i have sitting in a stack next to me when's the last time you went to a when's the last time you went to like a staples or an office depot to print something i'm sure it's been quite a while for you so long ago i don't i can't remember the last time i needed to print something i guess ever okay well i had to print hundreds of pages yesterday low hundreds really for your little book or whatever yeah but like i was like oh whatever i'll do it when i get to florida it's no big deal it'll be easier so i you know i pull up of course the the staples is located next to an aldi my least favorite grocery store smell like broken here it smell like broken here so i i go to the staples i'm like hey you know i used to do this all the time i used to make hardcore flyers and duplicate them you know i i know how the system works i go to the desk like hey i just want to print some stuff and they're like oh you thought we don't do that here just go over to the printer and it'll have the instructions for you so much like

at the airport now where you have to tag your own bag, they're basically like, you need to email the PDFs to this address, and then we'll send you a code, and then you enter that code in on the screen of the printer, and then you'll be charged for your print. Okay. Self-checkout vibes. Yeah. I just didn't know. I didn't know we had gotten there because these two fucking, you know. coastal fat asses were sitting there with their you know just looking at me like i was fucking crazy and i was like you know what guys it wouldn't be it wouldn't hurt for you to get up and walk around a little bit and help me with this if i'm keeping it a buck and then i had to i had to ask for some paper clips and it was like it was like this bitch was on life support i was literally i asked her for paper clips and she breathed out like i had like i said something about her mother it was fucking crazy crazy okay she let out a big obese guffaw you know that that does remind me i was at um like a little fedex kinko type center in glendale just a block north or so of the americana from hbo's hacks and i remember the last time i had to like ship some shit to europe or whatever and they it was the printing guy and i uh i had to stop him From literally looking at pornography on the computer in the center of this Kinko's FedEx. So fire. Like literally just looking at like some pogs or some shit. I don't remember what it was. And luckily for him, it was just him and I, like a family with children. It was a fellas, understand, fellas situation. I cleared my throat underneath my breath, give the man his decency and his time to minimize frantically out of his. Yo, yo, yo, fam, I can see the chub from here. I need to get something sent out, bro. Can you please click off that? That's really fucking funny. I should have blackmailed him, I'd say. You know what I mean? Those international overnight prices to Bulgaria, not cheap. I'd hate for your supervisor to know about your live jasmine sesh that you were doing on the clock. Hey, man, what can you do for me so I don't tell your boss about your live jasmine bill? You know what time it is, Patty. You know what time it is. What can we do here? Oh, but it's, once again, printing.

is somewhat of a lost art and i don't own a printer and many people don't um but carolyn has a printer she does a lot of work printing it is nice to yeah it's it's having it in the home now i just want to buy one so i never have to have that experience again even though it's so rare i i feel like it's a it's a must you're gonna get so aggravated owning a printer the amount of things and troubleshooting that goes wrong and then you're gonna accidentally your boomer ass is gonna subscribe to the ink Hey, hey, hey. No, no, no. We're going to have to use rocket money to get your little ass out of it. Listen to me right now, bro. I would never fuck up and subscribe to anything on Amazon. Talking about green running low. Had to re-ug. Where's my magenta? My shit's looking off. I know. I mean, that happens with my true nutrition. You know, I'll come back from a two-week trip, and I'll just have a pyramid of bags full of creatine just on the doorstep as if I'm doing some gnarly numbers. But yeah, I just love the sound of the Inkjet HP shooting out a document, an invoice, or whatever it may be, a printing label from Carolyn's office. It sounds like... real work is getting done in this work from home environment where it's just me making podcasts if i had more space i would do what i i didn't know this until i was of age and my my father told me but you know he had some fucking turbo ass printers in his accounting like some big boys like like you know size of a young man and i was always like aren't these super i was like aren't these super expensive and he was like nobody buys these dumb ass they're people rent these it's like a lease Imagine if I got so frustrated that I just go lease the $25,000 fucking Prius of printer multi-tray. We got color. We got laser. We got everything you need. And then I'm set for life. That feels like something I would do in a Robin Biggs-style house. What did I blow all my money on? The Dot Matrix revival. You said bring back print. I took that shit literally.

Okay, so you might die from the rain. Do we have any leaks happening? No, actually, no. The house is solid. No leaks yet. Everything's good so far. I mean, the floor is rumbling beneath my feet due to thunder, but otherwise, I'm going to be fine. I'm going to persevere. This has already been the hardest week of my life, but... This is what I have to do, Jason. This is all part of the process. This needed to happen for you to finish your thing. And I think when you finally come back, all the scarring should heal, the swelling will have gone down, and no one will know, right? I mean, your book will be finished. You know what? I called my publisher. I was like, I need a couple more months down here. The med spas are much more affordable, and I just can't. I'm thinking South Korea is sort of the vibe right now. Well, there's all this stuff happening online right now with a queen of mine, the beloved Mandy Moore, a singer, actress. She was married to problematic genius singer-songwriter Ryan Adams. There's a picture of her going viral from a red carpet where her face looks noticeably different. And there are people like, oh, my God, what happened to her? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then one of those, you know, all those accounts that sort of have their little face floating in the corner TikTok style that explain. Sure. The woman was basically like, nah, I think she just lost weight rapidly. And then somebody in the comments was like, yeah. She lost her house in the fires in Altadena, so I feel like she's been under some stress. Oh, don't bring fires into the facelift. Come on. No, I think it's a combination of fire stress and GLP-1s, and I think that's fine. She does look a little haggard, but I expect Mandy to make a full recovery and bounce back once Gavin Newsom stops fucking around with their insurance money. I think things will get better. I feel like Mandy has sort of had a weight loss journey.

She kind of has been snatched for a little while. I think it's more so like her face in general is different. This person on Instagram was like, oh, no, she's had like an eye lift and shit, but that was a couple years ago. What you're seeing now and noticing now and talking about is just a simple weight loss and probably caused by the combination I mentioned earlier. What I'm seeing, I think this is mostly makeup. I also think that's a pop. I think just this lipstick is obviously, the color's not working for her, and it's really smeared on. She usually goes Joker 2 style. She usually goes with a more nude palette. I'll say that. Yeah. It makes her cheeks pop, and now her cheeks lack pop. She looks like the before photo of a plastic shirt. Yeah. You know, five years ago, it's like, oh, cutie alert. And then now it's like, oh, you. I'm I'm I don't know. I'm fine with it. I think she'll make a full recovery. It's not as crazy as Emma Stone's. What would you call the stone went Chris Jenner mode, which I mean, for Chris, it works because we expect nothing less. Emma Stone's like thirty five at best. I don't I don't understand it. I don't understand it. But I want to talk about this movie that got announced from. Charlie XCX and Aiden Zamiri. But there's a lot of people in it that have been on this show. I think I know where this is going. No, no, no. Kate Berlant, Rachel Sinnott, Mel Ottenberg, Goth Princess, Tish Weinstock. But the one that stuck out to me, Kylie Jenner. So what do you think Kylie Jenner can do? Because besides look good. Do you know what I'm saying? Like, do you think she's going to surprise us with some chops that we didn't see coming? Because I do kind of think that's a possibility. I believe that she is going to have a little walk on two line role. Not unlike a Huck Tua in the whatever. She was just in a TV show. Was she? It was.

Oh, it's called Chad Powers. Oh, yeah. Chad Powers is from our friends over there, the Disney Corporation. That's right. What's his name? Why am I blanking on his name? Yeah, we're super blanking right now. Glenn Powell, GP. Glenn Powell. Glenn Powell walks on to a college football field and plays, but he's actually an adult. A classic trope. A classic trope. Hawk Tua should be on that. That's cool that Hawk Tua is on that. I like that a lot. And she... steals the show but she only had really two lines you know i just feel like kylie's been spending time with you know timothy chalamet recent uh joiner of the head shave club and i think maybe some of his uh chops could have rubbed off on her that's not meant to be an innuendo and i think i think that maybe yeah who's who's uh who's timmy running lines with his life partner right exactly i mean if she was Imagine if she was trying to do this with Travis Scott. I think he only makes noises. So that wouldn't work. For Travis Scott, it's more so with the Tide pen out because he spilled again or whatever it might be. You know that they're out in Calabasas and Travis Scott's eating mashed peas with one of those rubber... Stormy Want Baba and Travi Want Baba both at the same time. So she's juggling that. Timothy also posted one of his twisted little videos to promote this new Marty Supreme movie. And I was talking to our friend Mikey last night. Not the Mikey you're thinking of, the other Mikey that we deal with. I don't want to dox anybody. And he was like, you know what's so funny about Timmy that's so interesting is that I forget that he's like raised on Kanye West. And that cannot be understated. Like how much that influences his behavior. Like microplastics, it gets in there whether you like it or not. Yeah, it gets in there and it makes an impression. And I was like, wow, I've never thought about that. And you're absolutely right. There is a little bit of that in this sort of performance. But I wish the best for Kylie. And we all know that Kanye has a type. And I'm sure that type is Kylie Jenner. So then Tim is like, yo, I'm...

Yeah. I'm the OG now, big bro. I'm the OG. I'll wear Timberlands in the summer. I don't give a fuck. But I think it's... I wish them both best of luck. Marty Supreme seems like a real winner. Everybody loves it. They're saying it's unbelievable. I'm sure I'll eventually see it once things calm down. They're saying Safdie Brothers about wrestling scaring the hoes. Safdie Brothers about ping pong. Yay. Yeah. They both picked... which is interesting. I don't think of them either, but I think the, I've been told the Marty Supreme, uh, soundtrack is what's his name. Um, and it's apparently amazing. His best work. Well, no tricks point never. Yeah. I don't say that out loud because I fuck it up every time. I'll just call him Daniel, but I don't know him like that. I'm not going to pull a Wes. I actually got a Jim from Daniel, actually. I don't know. Oh, you don't know him? Okay. It's cool. It's cool. The music's different. We have a guest today. I think this is the quickest return to How Long Gone ever. Yeah, because Lucas Gage may have been the... Most talked about guests that we've had. I probably received the most positive messages about that episode. Yeah, he's a little more well-liked than the Baha'i faith in the How Long Gone universe. But he's got a book that's making waves. I wrote this for attention. He put his pretty face on cover like a real G. It's first week. We're trying to get those sales up. But he's an actor. You know him from our show. You know him from all his shows. He's our favorite little slut. Let's get into the dirt. With the OG. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian stateside with Kai and Carter. This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's trying to slow down. The news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world. And I know you particularly have quite a lot of questions. A lot of questions. But how often? Because we do this podcast three times a week and that's a sweet spot. How many times do they do? Three times a week. And I have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points that they're maybe going to be covering different stuff than we do. That's just a guess. The Guardian is not some billionaire owned.

They're not afraid to say what they want to say, brother. Yeah, Rupert ain't sniffing around in what journalists Kai Wright and Carter Sherman are up to over there at Stateside. But yeah, listen wherever you get your podcasts. You can watch it on YouTube. It's three times a week. And who couldn't use more news? You know, especially when it's not, you know, from here, let's say. Give it a listen. Give it a listen. All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Quince. Jason, the temps are warming up. It's getting hot out there. Summer always changes how I get dressed. I need pieces that feel lighter, more breathable, and that are just easy but still put together. I don't look like a slob. That's why I keep coming back to Quince. They focus on high-quality essentials that feel and look amazing. Breathable linen and soft organic cottons. Well-made basics but without the luxury markups. That rare balance where everything feels elevated. but still effortless. Yeah, Chris, linen season is here. I wore a linen blazer to dinner a few nights ago in the warm California sun. But, you know, you got that Italy trip coming up this summer and quality European linen pants and shirts. Upgrade that look starting at just $34. You know, if you get a nice linen suit, a little t-shirt underneath it, some chill shoes, you're looking good, but you're staying cool. The inside of your special areas are nice and dry as you turn up with your besties. So elevate that summer wardrobe. Go to quince.com slash how long for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns, even on a nice holiday now available in Canada. That is Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash how long. That'll get you free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince punto com slash how long. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Squarespace. Obviously, Jason, you and I spend a lot of time on the World Wide Web, sort of our peers, our listeners, our friends, our colleagues, maybe even your parents if they're freaky. And if you're doing anything in the world.

writing, taking pictures. I do topless boxing. You need a website. Exactly. A website that works, that does what it's supposed to do, that allows you to be creative but also business-minded. Jason, there's one place to go for that, Squarespace. Yeah, Chris, I'm over here. I'm modifying calculators and putting Claude inside of them so you could cheat at school. And I just want a place where I could have everything all in one place. I can have the SEO tools. So those future graduates can find me and, you know, I'm able to accept, quote unquote, donations for my services that might be gray area. You know what I mean? And then email campaigns. Hey, I got a new, you know, 2.3 version upgrade. Boom, boom, boom. Get the analytics going. Raise some money. You know, show your investor all of your cool analytics of what's going on. They're going to want to get in early and we can use Blueprint AI to make your website look as professional. as your competition, if not more. Head to squarespace.com slash howlong for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code howlong to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. Casting couch. Why are you showing us your casting couch? No, it's my future architectural digest. Okay. I'm manifesting my conversation pit. That's exactly what's going on. That is. All right. Lucas, welcome back to How I'm Gone. Where are you right now? Oh, are you in your model's apartment that you told me about? No, this is the Tribeca frat house, Harvard bros that I'm living in. I'm living with five guys that went to Harvard in the same frat, and they had an open room, and that's where I'm currently living. Yeah, so if you're wondering about going to Harvard, once you graduate, you can live in a house with five dudes in Tribeca. Yeah. Fast track to success. It's worth every penny, though. It's worth every penny. That crimson you can't replicate. Okay, you told me about this last time I saw you. Or maybe at the J. Crew that you told me about this. Have you successfully had intercourse with any of these fraternity brothers since? No circle jerks. No orgies have happened since. But a lot of conversations that are...

They're questioning, you know? You're saying they're Lucas Curious or just in general curious? I don't know if they're me curious. Are you breadcrumbing these bros? No, you got to. You got to. You got to. Leave a trail of creatine to your bedroom? There's just like Celsius in every corner of this apartment. Wait, you're saying you have mushroom gummies if I come in your room? Okay. I'll check it out. Okay, a lot of Celsius on campus. Does this apartment or building have a name, like a nickname? Oh, that's a good question. Like how a frat house might? There's got to be a nickname for the place, but I'm the new roomie. Okay, so are you doing your part? Are you kind of, you know, if somebody takes a couple slices of your provolone, are you pissed off? Are you writing your name on the Cheerios? Are you cool? No, I'm cool. We've organized a dinner every Sunday, so we have our traditions, but we all kind of do our own thing, but it's been nice. I feel like I have a new group of friends, and I feel like I'm experiencing what it would have been like if I went to college and had roommates. Well, look, if you would have gone to college based on what I know about you, your roommates wouldn't have been this hot just based on where you would get in. But, I mean, I could be. I guess San Diego. You don't think San Diego Community College would be hot, people? That's a good point. There's a lot more Latin flavor at the very least. Okay, so every Sunday, all the bro, I don't care what, no sluts, no sports, no devices. Guys night. dudes only we're gonna make nana style lasagna and then everyone just goes around and pitches is that what happens kind of one of the guys is the cook of the house he's in charge of the meals and we just have you know we just have a little family bro time where we just check in with how we're feeling do you zell does everybody zell him at the end because he cooks or is it i haven't even paid for the rent i haven't even you're like bro uh

I left the gourmet garage receipt on the fridge. Did you not see the pink highlighted part? I think you're paying in other ways other than cash. Oh, no. My tecla towel fell down a little bit. Oops. No, it's your job to get them into the dope parties. You know, I've been going to their parties, actually. But it feels very much like a start of a porn when everyone's just in their boxers ironing on a Sunday morning. I like this for you, but I feel like you're doing this. partly for financial reasons but also because it may like lead to something uh inspirationally not not sexually like i feel like maybe this is yeah method this is more for like the bit in the story yes this is a this is an fx series ready to be written yeah it really it really kind of if any drama can do it i think you can too overcompensating season two you know that's i'm drawing on her character so you know i think Yeah, there's definitely, I love everything for a story. And it's just funny to say I did it. And also I'm making $4 on this movie that I'm doing out here. Yeah, I guess that those relocation budgets. So like here's $1,000 for the month of New York. Yeah, New York. I was about to say there's no amount of money that can really make it work in New York. Unless you're Jennifer Lawrence and you're living at the Greenwich. That's no shot at you. I just feel like there's no way to make it work. There's only so many like. I've DMed every hotel asking if I could do a post for them. And they're like, we don't care. We don't want it. We can do a week. We can't do two months. Sorry, we're not going to be able to swing that. The month is the long time. I can get you like three days comped. No problem. We can talk later. If you just need a staycation away from the guys. Yeah, we'll talk later. Check out the W Hoboken. They're reopening. This might be the time. I did the W Union Square for a week, but Hoboken might be where I need to hit up next. Hoboken could be sick for you too as far as this sort of... If you're on this path, I think Hobo, why not? Let's do it. What did you think about Addison Rae? Not to change subjects, but was your mind blown? I don't know if my mind was blown. I didn't even know that you were there and we were standing on the same VIP balcony. That's because your creepy ass knelt.

underneath people jason people were you see that were you the crawler yes i was the crawler you were the crawler well you were you're with a there was a girl though too it was me and chase suey wonders who was in the movie with me and we just fucking ducked under people got trampled on uh i'm like literally sitting underneath julia fox's vagina watching addison ray kill it on stage some people some people would pay good money for that but you got it for free lucas wins some people have i have fucking one okay so pissed because you guys are both tiny little demons going through everyone's legs because i saw you scurrying and i was like who is that how'd they get up here kind of thing if i would have known it was you because i felt so bad because like i'm six nine and i was having a hard time seeing the show yeah so like What does that mean for a normal-sized person? And Chase is, I'm assuming, a small... She's small, yeah. You have no choice but to go in between the legs. And did you enjoy the show in that way? I thought it was kind of one of the best seats in the house, honestly. I agree. pressed up against a fence uh really right above addison watching her do her thing i loved it that's the worst that's the worst venue in in new york by far terminal five is rotten it's rotten the location the setup once you're there it feels like you're in jail and you're looking down at somebody performing in the yard kind of vibe and i don't like that i fucking hate it I hate it. Addison Rae was exactly what I thought it would be. A lot of dancing, not very much singing, but it doesn't matter. I loved it. It was 10 songs. Every concert should be 10 songs. Let's make it an hour long. I agree with that. Let's make a lot of dancing. Stretch those 10 songs out. Call it a day. I can't do these. Were you turnt up? Yeah. Because you were late. I was late. Me and Chase came from set. We ran off set early and we got trapped by the stills photographer. Trapped for... car in front of ours and we ran back to set like prosthetics and wigs falling off screaming at them to move their car like we have to go to addison move move and somehow chase got a spot right in front of terminal five and came in at the first song or second song that's pretty that's pretty good i i i what is the what kind of prosthetics are you wearing for this movie i mean i'm i'm actually not the other people are wearing prosthetics it's a

It's a biopic. They won't let me talk. I'm sure it'll be out in a minute. She's wearing a wig and other people are wearing a fake nose and all that stuff. I had to perm my hair. Mine wasn't that crazy. I just wanted to make the story sound better. A perm is a serious commitment and change to one's physical appearance. I agree. You just did subway takes. How do you think you did? Let's scoop him. What's the take? We'll bleep it. We'll bleep it. We'll bleep it. My take was I had a couple that I was playing with, and the most natural one that came out was, I think, sex sh**. But do you have a subconscious desire to hide your body by the cover of darkness? Yeah, I think the lighting is not great in the morning. I want lights off. I want, you know, I want to be clean. I want... Do you like to see with your hands? Correct. Correct. It's funny because you strike me as a bit of an exhibitionist. Not saying you're bent over the ping pong table in Tompkins, but you know what I mean. Not yet. You know, I am a little bit of an exhibitionist, but I feel like more... I would be okay with the exhibition happening just at nighttime. I just don't. In the morning, I'm not ready. I need to prepare. If you haven't scrubbed your tongue yet, it's just, you know. It's a lot of bacteria. What if it's just a little morning top? Just a little whoops. Like a morning. Well, that's it. You ain't got to do much. Just like a morning, like just the tip? No, not even that. No, you're just laid back. You got to know. Your only job is to look happy. You know, you ain't got to do shit. Yeah. There's only one hole in play. Only one whole plan. It's not mine. And it's where you put your chia pudding in. My overnight oats have to wait. I think you could wrap your brain around that, right? I could do it. I could do it. You have to pee first, of course. I gotta pee. It's a thing. It's a lot. So are you enjoying your time in New York? I feel like this is a long stretch for you. It is. It is.

Well, I'm enjoying running into you for two minutes at a time. Yeah, that's a gift. That's a gift that people wish they could get. Yeah, no, it was great. That's been great. I'm having fun here. It's a lot. I'm kind of exhausted with the press part of things. You've been really busting it wide open. I said to Jason, I don't know who's busting it more, him or Mark Ronson. You guys have been on a fucking tear. We're on a fucking ramp. And then, you know, they pull certain things from your book. So I'm like. gonorrhea chlamydia boy uh i'm doing a fucking brand deal for prep so i'm just really it is just like it doesn't get more hold on you're actually doing a brand deal for prep i'm doing a brand deal for prep right now okay that's a dream healthy sexuals healthy sexuals baby uh gilead and i teamed up and okay for selling it so it's like a new form of sexuality like a heterosexual homosexual healthy sexual is that the yeah there's a there's a it's just for everyone you know perhaps for everyone we've you know we've ideated on this program about creating prep for straight people and we got a lot of we we got a lot of i'm not going to say negative feedback but no one seems super interested and now it sounds like you're being paid to shield exactly that i'm being paid to sell that message exactly Exactly. See, how long gone makes the world takes, as usual. Okay. Well, that's – yeah, because you said in the book that you had a couple run-ins with the STIs, correct? That's the deal? Yeah, I should have really thought about that when I was writing this book that, like, I didn't think when I'm writing my book a year ago in my room, like, oh, this is a really funny story. I got a double whammy STI from an axe like that. Soon that would be all over Google and Yahoo and my mom and family members sending me an article. They know you're a little bit wrong. They know I'm a slut. Mom, I'm a slut. You knew this was coming. Nobody passed out from surprise and shock when they learned that you may have had to take a pill a while ago. Yeah, they were mild.

It was a mild case. It was a mild STD. But you're saying what happens, and this is obvious to anybody who consumes media of any sort when someone's promoting something, you're saying basically that the same two or three things are cherry-picked by every single place you go, and they want to talk about it. Like, so how old were you when you were sexually assaulted? What was that like? Was that bad? Awesome. They loved. bringing that one out over and over again because i was i was joking with jason earlier about how you know mark has to go do like npr and talk about turntablism but you have to go sit in some room with two gay guys being like so what was it like meeting aliyah that was so amazing wasn't it you did you fuck her yeah you don't have to tell me and you're like all right so the camp counselor touched your dick when you were 10 was that what it was Yeah, it's just a different... It's watching these two things in parallel, and the difference is clear, let's say. Yeah. But you're at the tail end. His book got turned into a movie or a TV show. Brad Pitt bought... Plan B bought Mark's book. Okay, Plan B bought your book. Prep bought... Sorry, Plan B bought Mark's book. Prep's gonna have to buy your shit and readapt it into... a healthy sexual tale let's fucking go if they want to be an ally to straights but did you think did you ever consider taking anything out once you had the whole thing in front of you you're like no i wish i i wish i did i mean yeah you're so right i'm literally getting uh and the questions also the ones are like the funniest one to me is a the sexual molestation one where they're like you wrote a line about how you were pissed that he ruined your rei sleeping bag and i'm like oh yeah no that was like a joke i was just trying to make light of that situation and they were like they just don't understand it or they're like so did you actually write this book for attention damn bro you gotta stop doing all these dear media podcasts they ain't got a whole lot i really i gotta come back this is where i feel safe those lobotomized shorties over at over at dear media ain't gonna ain't gonna ask you the questions you want to answer that's just what the deal is no i know yeah over here on how long gone we're gonna be like

I know you got a Halloween costume already planned. How gay is it going to be? Are you dressing up again as a popper, or you've traded this year? No, but I'm going to have poppers and mushrooms at my book party that you guys are coming to on Tuesday. We've got them to sponsor it, so you will be coming. I wish I was there. I wish I was available. Wait, is it in New York or LA? Yeah, it's in New York on Tuesday. I'm in town on Tuesday. Better get your fucking ass out there, Jason. Where is it? Well, I don't want to dox it, I guess. You can bleep it out. Nice. Okay, so they're spending every penny on this thing. They're ready to really get you. Do you have to hire your own publicist? No, I had to whore myself out to meta and threads. I had to get my own publicist. Yeah, and to answer your question about the book thing, I was doing the Audible a month ago, and my voice and I was like, nobody clocked some of these lines in here. I made a metaphor about... feeling like a whore in Nantucket with Laffy Taffy like stuck to my jeans or something like insane like that and I'm like no editor at Simon & Schuster said hey maybe this doesn't work. You're like seven people read this in full multiple times and no one's gonna yeah but you know I think that what you think shouldn't slip through and what a normal you know I think they also I would assume if I was on that side of it that you want all of this in here because you're a pretty live out loud person. Yeah. Yeah. No. I think that part is okay. I just feel like I don't even know if they ever really read it. And the amount of grammar errors, even I clocked it. And I'm like, yeah, basically all to say, if you sell a book, you will be doing all of the work yourself, including editing. But do you think that, all right, so are you happy that you did it? Do you feel like you accomplished something? Or are you like, what did I just do with two years of my life? I'm never happy. I haven't finished the whole book, but I feel like once I do, I will learn that whatever happens, you won't be happy, right? Yeah, I mean, there's not a pretty clean redemption arc or a big thing that I saw at the end of it. I think it's pretty insane that I manically decided to write a book and that it's actually going to be on bookshelves and people are going to be reading it. I think it's pretty good. It's not perfect.

I like it, though. I'm proud of it. But you're saying you're happy that you did it. Overall, it's a W for you mentally. It's a W for me mentally. I think I'm going to be able to be happy once it's done, once all the press junkety tour stuff. Once that's over, I think I could probably actually enjoy it. i enjoy this i enjoy talking to you guys yeah well we're few and far between you really are but like like any good thing you know huge whatever a marriage or a divorce or a move or a release or whatever you know A lot, a lot of work. And as soon as you're on the other side of it, then you can, that's when you can enjoy it. Totally. Yeah. Well, yeah, I know you have no problem celebrating. So at least we're in that phase. Yeah, no, we're going to, we're going to, I'm going to try to be present and enjoy and celebrate. And do you think this is going to sort of close a chapter? Like, are you thinking that some of this stuff, like the divorce and all the shit that was so public will kind of like. ride off into the sunset a little bit like this is the final word in some ways i hope so i feel like i'm just like i'm like how much more can i fucking talk about that in the fucking viral video i feel like i just kind of put it all out there i forgot about the viral video shit i know i'm like i just gave them i gave both of those things a whole chapter so i could probably just stop talking about it and i feel annoying talking about it too because you know people want to bring it up again and these press things and i'm like i get it like i Don't know why I'm talking about it two years later about my three-month marriage. It's getting old. I've got to get some new stories. Yeah, but I think that if people don't know you and know that you contain multitudes of way worse and more interesting shit than that, that they're going to focus on what they know. Thank you for saying that. But we know that if we crack that egg, it's nasty in there. There's better stuff for us to mine. There's way better stuff. My favorite critique is the wedding. And the viral video are the least interesting chapters compared to everything else. I'm like, I love that. That's a fucking amazing compliment. Yeah, that's good feedback. And also, you know, even though you're a young person, you're writing about things that you did, you know, 20 years ago and enough time has passed where you could be writing about, you know, cybering on The Sims as a kid. And now, like, you know, Y2K Sims is like back in Vogue and maybe.

the sims movie is getting cast and oh this guy has a history with it and boom and now you're doing voiceover at the sims now you got a new house with a pool you know the sims movie is a great idea fuck polly pocket let's do the sims movie yeah the sims has legs yeah were you what were you doing up on the sims were you cybering house oh i was doing the sims online version um i don't know there was like an expansion where you could like your family were real people online. Don't say expansion pack. That sounded too expert level. You're not a nerd. Yeah, yeah. Fuck that. It was a different version. You're too hot for expansion packs. You should only be doing the stock version. Yeah, you're too hot for expansion packs. Come on, bro. I think that I'm always tackling early internet in my mind because that was a big... Jason, I are older than you, but that was like a huge part of our sort of adolescence and upbringing. Not only taking 30 minutes to see a single titty, the download speeds, but also... Lime wiring for some titties. Yeah, but I mean, I literally was thinking about LimeWire today. Like, I would just leave that shit running. Oh, me too. It was like, it was just 24 hours a day downloading constantly. Yeah, no, me too. I was talking about Faces of Death on LimeWire and like all these... things that the editors wanted me to cut down on and the only one that they really loved were like the me having uh sex with cyber sex with strangers online on sims for the for the ones that were allowed to stay they're like faces faces of death but it's crazy that faces of death is just regular everyday shit now no i know it's youtube it's literally youtube yeah for some people i think there was a meatspin.com joke that that stayed in the in the in the book i'm sorry i'm sorry what was that what was that one you remember meatspin.com Meatspin.com. Is that like the Al Pastor? I'm a foodie. I don't know how that... Let me get my big knife out. Meatspin.com is like what you would send to your friends and be like, oh my God, check out this website. And it's just a guy like fucking riding a dick with his dick spinning around and around. Oh, a prank site, if you will. Yes, it's a prank site. Yeah. Okay.

Oh, this is huge for me personally. This episode of How I'm Gone is brought to you by TaskRabbit. Oh, baby, let me tell you something. This is not a joke. I use TaskRabbit a lot because I can't do anything. You need some art hung? TaskRabbit. You need something put together? A cabinet? Got to reach that cheese grater on the top shelf? TaskRabbit. Anything you need, TaskRabbit can take care of it for you. How it works, TaskRabbit connects you with skilled taskers in your area. They can help you move. They can assemble furniture, repairs, yard work, mounting, and more. You can search for a tasker based on cost, skill set, availability, and past client reviews so you know exactly who's showing up and can have confidence that they know what they're doing because taskers have assembled over 3.4 million pieces of furniture, completed 700,000 home repairs. handled 1.5 million moves, and the numbers are just going up, Jason. Yeah, throw a little money at the problem. It's not so expensive, and that job that you really don't want to do is something that another person out in the world is very good at doing and would gladly do it in exchange for a little bit of money. So when life happens, your to-do list grows. Get ahead of it now and get $15 off your first task at TaskRabbit.com or grab the TaskRabbit app using promo code How long? Taskers book up faster, especially for same-day tasks. So book trusted home help today. That is $15 off your first task using promo code howlong with the TaskRabbit app or at TaskRabbit.com. Hi Talk House Network listeners, it's your old friend Nels Klein from Wilco here. Wilco is touring this summer and we'd love to see you somewhere on the road. We're playing shows this June and July in Rochester Hills, Michigan, Chautauqua, New York, Lafayette, New York, Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, Vienna, Virginia, Forest Hills, New York, Portland, Maine, Tulsa, Oklahoma, Memphis, Tennessee, La Grange, Georgia, Charleston.

South Carolina, Virginia Beach, Virginia, Wheeling, West Virginia, and Columbus, Ohio. Plus, there are even more dates, some with Willie Nelson that I didn't even mention here. So please go to wilkoworld.net to see the full list of dates. We'll see you on the road this summer. This episode is brought to you by Prime. What if you had one more chance with the one that got away? Sam, you came home. based on the best-selling novel from Carly Fortune. Every year after follows childhood friends Sam and Percy as they reunite in the dreamy, nostalgic lakeside town of Ferry's Bay. Love can be hard to find. So if you're lucky enough to find that person, never let go. A second chance at first love. Every year after, streaming June 10th, only on Prime. The early version of sending the big, naked guy with the giant dick. Oops. Oh, wow. I've never heard of that one. Okay. Is it still available? Just if I wanted to prank my friend Jason? Just Google Meat Spin. I'm sure you could find a gif. I ain't Googling Meat Spin. No, don't trick me. I'm not stupid. It's like rotisserie. It's nice. I wanted to talk about pools. You had a line in the book saying, growing up, living in SoCal. in multiple houses with no pools was more upsetting than your parents divorce yeah and and having grown up in orange county with as somebody who did not grow up with a lot of money or a pool but around a lot of people who had monies and pools i understand uh that feeling so yeah do you feel like you're gonna have like a a special like full circle life moment once you Own a pool? Or is that even a goal of yours? No, it definitely is a goal. I bought a townhouse this year and I hate it. And I'm like, I don't know why I did it. Did you feel pressure from a business manager to make an investment? I sure did. Is it in the Hollywood area? It's like in the worst part of Hollywood, like on Sunset Boulevard with no backyard. No, I love it, but I'm ready to get rid of it. And I went to a psychic who told me.

He said, I walked into this psychic and he was like, you just bought a house. No pool. No backyard. You need one. And I was like, I actually do. That is so true. That's one of the most L.A. That's an L.A. psychic. I didn't know that my wife was a psychic. Holy shit. There's this L.A. psychic in Beverly Hills that many people go to. And he kind of says the same thing to all of us. Like he tells us all to check our prostate. I think he has a deal. I think he has some kind of scheme with a prostate doctor that he's like, I'm going to refer people. You're saying the psychic and the urologist are in cahoots. Yeah, they're in cahoots. My prostate stays checked, mama. Yeah, it stays. Okay, so now that you've reached an age where you're like, I could sell the Hollywood townhouse that's right in the mix. Yeah. I don't need to be able to walk to Pink Taco. And I could go over the hill down the street. He's like, bro, remedy places right there. It's a sick cold. I'm a Cali guy. I'm a Cali guys, you know, but you could take that money. Yeah. Bop over the hill to studio city or wherever. Yeah. And get a little suburban home with a pool. I better not see your ass walk in with a big bundle of flowers and vintage jeans outside of Jones on 3rd. Do not do that. That position's already filled, okay? We don't need another one. Only room for one, brother. So where would you go, though, if it was up? Jason's saying if you're ready to leave the confines of Hollywood. Have you considered Glendale? Where could an actor like you go? I mean, this doesn't help my pool problem because... pools were very important to me as a kid any kind of source of water was very important to me but now i'm like do i just say fuck la and move to new york do i do it that's the only answer and that that also takes the pool out of the equation completely it's impossible it's impossible you guys have community pools here you guys have soho house yeah yeah it's called no there yeah the soho house pool is more of a hot tub um and i don't mean that

it's not actually hot. The water to jizz ratio is in line with Le Bon. It's worse than your shower right now at that fucking... Oh my God, it's bad here. Yeah, it's worse. It's bad. I would say that a pool in New York... Yeah, there is... I remember there's a public pool deep Lower East Side that people would go to, but this is quite a long time ago. I think that it's so out of the question to have a pool in Manhattan especially that you can free yourself from the chains. You don't need this anymore. Leave the chlorine in California. It's like getting a vasectomy for your pool desire. It's just not there. Kill it. Kill it. Okay. I might do that. I'm having fun here. I'm really liking it. Well, it's the greatest city in the world, and I think that also... Winter is coming, though, brother. Winter is coming. Ain't no fun no more. That's true. But I feel like Hollywood's been decentralized because of the... kind of rut that la is in at least like hollywood wise you know there's nothing there you could go wherever now it doesn't matter it doesn't matter i could you know a lot of people are doing the whole texas thing the whole nashville thing i don't know i don't know i feel like i kind of just want to go back to renting out my shitty studio apartment and just going from place to place that was a better there's some there's some the problem is the pressures from the powers that be to own something yeah are too great to resist especially if you have the bread right powers that be meaning a wife or a business manager you only have one of those and i think that it's it's not it doesn't makes everyone feel as good you know what i mean it's like some people really want that and i think some people generally don't care but it's like you have to it feels like you have to do it to be an adult No, it does. And I'm kind of against that. I kind of just want to rent and just make anytime something breaks, make somebody else worry about it. I don't know why I spent so much money on a fucking sewer. You don't want to be the landlord of a bop house. You want to pay the landlord of a bop house. That's exactly right. You fix it. You do it. I can't. I don't know how to do it. I can't. I had a question that randomly popped in my head reading a book.

Do you ever feel that the people around you don't get your references? Did you not get a lot of the references? No, no, no. I got all the references. But I just mean in general, in life, like you being like a quirked up little freak. Yeah. Have you ever felt like growing up, like I'm saying all this dope shit and everyone around me is like, what are you talking about? Like, I don't get it. I feel like. If they don't get it, they're not for me. It's like the people that are asking me that in the interview about the title of the book, I'm like, oh, you're going to hate this book. But I don't know. You're never going to win people over trying to win people over. You know what I mean? what chair you're selling they're gonna hop on to the next chair in the store you know so hop on okay haverties go off so you you fail fast with relationships i have the same correct i like you know i'm gonna say something and you're either gonna it's a fork in the road you're either with me or i'm gonna know instantly if you're not fucking with the campaign and it makes it easier to just move on yeah well Jason, when you're touching 50 and you talk like a 23-year-old, sometimes that turns people off. I'm saying that about myself as well. Good. If I'm around my peers age-wise, but maybe they're not quite as logged on, they're going to be like, what are these words that you're saying? Like, you're a dumbass, which I see both sides is what I'm saying. And then I get to say, oh, you don't know about all the cool stuff that I know about. You're a lame. I don't have to talk to you anymore and I could go hang out with the cool people that get all the things I'm saying. What I'm saying to you is cool is up to the user. Unfortunately, I wish there was a global understanding. I wish there was too. This was going to be one of my takes this morning on the subway thing. I was going to say one of my takes was dates are annoying or they're a waste of time. We should just... it will have like a five minute FaceTime before we go on a date to just see. Well, luckily, luckily in your community, that's not even necessary. You can meet up behind the bush. I can get on the grounder. You don't gotta snippies. You don't gotta do that. It is that you're right. I think that people are scared of dating, but I think that's something that the gay community, once again, leaders have, have been like, you know what?

Who needs a date? Yeah, would you rather have a five-minute consultation over FaceTime or several detailed armpit photos? Fuck, probably like a mixture of both. I want to know right away if I'm going to fuck with that little pit. And then I want a consultation before I go to Via Corotta for like a two-hour spaghetti and realize that I fucking hate you. the whole time. What if you're going to Via Corotta and it's someone you hate, but you don't have to pay? How much better does that make it? I'll sit through it. I'll sit through anything. For anything free, I'm like, throw me in there. Damn, you and Jason are the same. You guys have a lot of similarities. I like this. I love free shit. But I will laugh at your jokes. Yeah. I don't like the free stuff. The implications are too strong. The tether that they have on you is too great these days. What they want for it is not worth what they're offering. Almost always. Yes, I agree. Spoken like a true pay pig. But I will take a free one still. I don't know why. I agree with what you're saying, but I still will. If it's free, I'll go. No, I think that. I think Jason feels the same way. I think he agrees with me, but also is like, I don't care. I'm going to check it out. Yeah, exactly. Scarcity mindset. I suffer from that so bad. Scarcity mods. Listen to you two fucking bullshitters. Hey, I have to justify why I get the goldfish on the Delta flights. You know what I mean? Even though I'm not hungry. I don't need the 300 cows. No, you don't. No, you don't. None of us do. I don't. None of us do. I was also thinking your name being Lucas and then changing to Lucas with a K about how at some point in your life you may have been Luke. gage oh my god i would be really is gage your real last name no it's my middle name i had a feeling that that's it's too porn star yeah but it reminded me of luke combs and then how funny it would be if luke combs was named lucas combs it would just change the whole dynamic you know what i mean that sounds like one of puffy's sons when you name him lucas it's like adding a spoiler to your name when you go lucas to luke you know who told you who made you change not made you but who suggested that you change your name um psychic

Yeah, my psychic in Beverly Hills and some shit, like crazy agent in the valley. Basically, he said, like, I want to give you a porn star name or a superhero name. And I was like, I got you. Just take my middle name. But he did also ask me something like, do you have anything on your record? Blah, blah, blah, blah. And put in my head that basically like Disney found out that you had any kind of things that they could look up. that you could you could be fucked oh he's saying like if you change your name you're better off because a disney legal team can't search you on and find yeah yeah that's what he was saying i don't even know if that was true but i i you know i felt like i was having to just cover all my cover all my it's enough logic that makes sense you know yeah as a 19 year old i believe some fucking valley agent um why is now now as a person who works pretty often Why is every actor unhappy with their agent at all times, no matter what level of success they are? I feel like we all just ask, what does anyone do constantly? I have this with more of my manager where I'm like, I don't know why I give you 10%. And he's like, exactly. Yeah. Do you like the manager as a person? Yeah, I love her. I mean, she's like a crazy, cool Russian chick that like... talks to me off the ledge a lot and maybe that's where the 10% goes. I was about to say, I know you enough to know that you're on that ledge often. Your little ass needs to be managed. You need to be managed. You need it more than most people. I do, but sometimes I'm like, should I just have a therapist do that for less money more often? Do you know what I mean? I feel like with musicians, when something goes wrong... They're blaming the booking agent or the manager or whoever. But with actors, they're just consistently unhappy no matter what. Yeah, we're always unhappy, and we're always changing our team. I mean, I think I have like four managers on IMDB right now, and I don't know which one to ever call or talk to. I have like eight agents at Toby and me, and I only talked to one of them. I don't know. I feel like that's sort of the name of the game, though. It's like whoever gets something across the line is the person you talk to. Everybody else, I don't need to talk to you. Exactly. And it's usually for smaller level talent.

people that aren't Tom Cruise's and Jennifer Lawrence's of the world, we're just going to sit on you in hopes that one day they're going to call your number, and then all of a sudden, when it's time to negotiate the $20 million deal, now we're best friends, now we're buddies, now we're cooking. But until then, we're just going to squat you. Yeah, basically. Squatting on that, Lucas. Love to get sit on it. I'm fine with that. I feel like that's how it's got to work. But there's no proactivity. It's all... It's all inbound. There's no outbound. Everybody can't win. And I also think that it's like, if you're a giant agency with all those fucking employees that need to pay their fucking BMW leases, you gotta just be like, I got 200 people, who do you want? And if one of them hits, it's like investing in startups. As long as one of them hits, you're fine. I'm not saying it's fair or how it should be, but I get the business model. Yeah, I get it too. I feel like... just become best friends or good friends with one of your agents and then be really nice to the assistants. That's the key. When did, when did the, when did the agent, when do you think in your career, when do you think the agents answered the phone the fastest at what stage, what stage they, was there a stage where they wouldn't answer it? And then all of a sudden they would, I guess is what I'm getting. I'm going to say right now with that prep money deal, they're suddenly calling me all the time. They're like, that pharmaceutical money. We're going to, Stop ignoring his goals. We need this right now. So you're saying Big Pharma is your Disney. Big Pharma is your Warner Brothers. And also, it's the perfect crime because so many people you'll get shit on if you're doing a... comedy festival in saudi arabia or doing uh right pfizer ad or whatever but you're saying like oh i'm sorry it's preventing yeah an incurable autoimmune disease a bad thing sorry i didn't realize how i'm sorry are you against miracles online i had one person on my team one agent who won't be named out of the eight people who were like who wrote back to the email when the offer came in like do not do this this will ruin your career and i'm like

First of all, did you see how much money it is? Second of all, it's saving people's lives. And you were okay with me doing a fucking tequila. How is that? This is a good thing. This is good for people. What are we doing? It's one of the only good drugs out right now. Yeah. And you're going to be on it soon, both of you. Can you get me a promo code for prep? The end of this interview. I can enter Lucas at checkout and get some free pills. I have a website, lucas.healthysexuals.com. Okay. Hook you up with some free prep. Honestly, I feel like if out of eight agents, there's one straight guy who doesn't know what prep is. No, he was the gay one, too. Oh. I get it. Well, you guys hate it. You guys hate it. We all hate it. Yeah, we hate it. I'm up on here. I'm up on lucas.healthysexuals.com and I'm going to allow all the cookies, mama. Hell yeah. Yeah, Lucas likes to prioritize his well-being and help others do the same. I bet he does. I think this is all great. When does this drop? Is there like a campaign? There's imagery, I assume, to go along with this? Yeah, I think I did press junket day where I just talked about prep for eight hours and there's a bunch of... shit that came out from that and um just getting made fun of left and right with all my friends sending me these little clips i mean that's pretty good i mean it's pretty good material for the friends funny it's pretty good so so what is the okay so it's it's commercial it's like commercials or is it instagram stuff oh it is it's one commercial thing one instagram thing and uh yeah yeah it's like a mix because i always see the prep commercials and they always try to fit that one straight couple in yeah but they're they're still sort of like non-binary vibes right it's not believe it's not believable i'm not getting those ads in my algorithm chris what's up with that no it's on tv it's on a lot there's always like two gay couple there's like an old gay couple like an interracial gay couple the the like bisexual kind of

thing going on and then like you said that like little in between straight thing that you can't figure out that's always what it is they're covering the bases the best they can you're kind of a little straight thing that we can't figure out lucas what do you mean exactly i think you would fuck i think you would fuck a chick tonight um i said this in an interview and i pissed people off too i was like they were like how gay are you and i was like what i don't i'm pretty fucking gay i married a guy on tv like i don't know what to tell you but like they're like i like i'm 10 I dip my toes in. You're a healthy sexual. I'm a healthy sexual. I like titties. Yeah, you're a healthy sexual. But I'm sure there's a few baddies out there that could, you know, one night with Lucas could happen if they played their cards right. Yeah, for sure. Girls love a gay guy. I've noticed that. They feel safe. Yeah, usually it's for friendship and fashion advice, but you're saying every once in a while things get crazy. Things get a little cuddly, a little snuggly. This totally is not going to affect our friendship. I thought you guys were saying, never mind. I just have this dream in my head that us three are going to just run a train on each other one day. Okay. I just feel like it could happen. I had a feeling that's where you're going to go with that, and that's not what I was saying at all. Does that line work on the other guys, Lucas? In the frat house? I mean, just in your day-to-day goings-on. How many times have you flipped a straight guy? Like, be honest. Don't give us a puffed-up percentage. No, no, I'm not going to lie and say a bigger number than it is. But I would say a handful. Out of these five straight guys, how many of them you think had another gay experience or they were just gay for Lucas? I think probably two of them ended up... Being gay later on. Two of them were probably legitimately the first. They weren't lying about me being their first experience. And then one of them was fully full of shit and just did it for the story. Wow. Which I'm okay with. I'm okay with. Yeah, of course. Because we've been on both sides of doing it for the story, right? All three of us train runners. Yeah. Oh, I'm such a liar. I get it. A little touche. Game recognized game. But out of all these people.

100% of them are HIV free. Thanks to our good friends at PrEP. I love you plugging it like that. Bringing it all back to PrEP. Jason, that's a great point. Thank you for saying that. I'm just trying to get some of that pharma money as well. Daddy needs a pool too. I got you. We'll get you on there. Did we do the top five prescription drugs when you were on the first time? I feel like we may have. Top five? No, I don't think we did. Did we not do that? Top five that I've ever taken? Well, yeah, obviously. Because I know that you've done pretty much every drug, right? At some point in your life? Yeah. My man. Not now. Not now. No, you're clean AF. Are you sober? No, I dabble with... I'm like a ketamine and Diet Coke kind of girl. Got it. I didn't think so, but I can never be sure. People are fluid. But only for therapeutic purposes, right? Therapeutic purposes and mushrooms, everything else I'm kind of off of and not into anymore. I got it out of my system quite early. But I have tried every pharmaceutical drug prescribed to me in my manic days. I can tell you. the top five of those yeah it can be recreational or not you know it could be just regular old beneficial but yeah let's go uh i mean prozac did me good she was good to me um for some reason prozac feels like a guy but i like you gendering prozac a woman she was good to me prozaca uh prozaciana prozaciana was she was sick she made me feel good and light savage little pill Savage little girly. Was not a fan of Zolofta. That made me manic. I was not well. Did either one affect weight? Oh, I got so fat on Trintilex. I gained like 40 pounds. If you watch Love, Victor, I was thicker than a snicker. Trintilex? I ain't never heard of Trintilex before. What is that? Is that an SSRI? It's an antidepressant. Yeah, it's an SSRI or an SSNRI, whatever the newer one is.

Basically, it has something in it that told me it's a newer drug that helps your cognitive abilities so it can make you smarter. I was really into that one. You're like, I'd rather be hotter than smarter. Please take this away. After that, I was like, give me the Adderall immediately. 40 pounds, that's a lot from just taking that. I would say probably like... around 30 pounds. I was like 150 and then I went to like 180 on that. Yeah, it was a lot. Okay. So that was not in the top five. It's honestly crazy. It's crazy how some of these things can affect your body. It really is. It blows my mind. No, it's crazy. It affects your metabolism too because I feel like I wasn't eating that crazy. I wasn't like I was... Maybe I was. I don't know. That one's pretty good. I liked... Well, Buterin was good but it kind of gave me panic attacks. Lamictal. Helpful-ish. Made me a little bit of a zombie, too, though. Is that another? That's an antipsychotic, I think. Sorry, it's a mood stabilizer. Lamictal. A mood stabilizer. Okay. Yeah. For bipolar disorder. You got some good insurance, chief. Yeah, I do. I know a couple of motherfuckers who need some of that. But what do you – so nowadays, because you seem pretty level, are you medicated or are you sort of like you've just figured it out maybe? I did the whole ketamine therapeutic thing where I was getting off of all of the pills and did a couple rounds of that. And then now I'm on like a super low dose. SSRI. I'm not even kidding. I'm taking halves and then I take a half of a fourth of a mood stabilizer and a fourth of one gabapentin. You sound like me when I'm trying to conserve Oxycontin in 2012. I think I'm very sensitive is what I found out. I definitely need something because I'm a freak and I need something to chill me out a little bit and make me not

you know, go into these, these States, uh, the highs are so high and the lows are so low. But I think the problem is I, I went through a phase where I talk about in the book where I like, they gave me so many, they gave me a cocktail of things and I just straightened my hair. wore fur jackets and married a stranger so like you're like you know what maybe i'll try the ketamine it can't be worse results than than the cocktail of pills i mean i think it's a really i think when you really need them it's a hard thing to figure out because the side effects seem to be all over the map yeah and like the generic versus the real brand versus the dosage it's just so many it's it's really like a math equation to get it right and find out what works for you yeah and everyone's you know body chemistry is different and reacts to things yeah it's very uh It's a very bespoke thing, this medication. But you feel good now. I feel really good. I feel really... My voice went up an octave like bullshit. I feel really good. No, it's fine. No, I do feel good. I feel content and I don't know. I don't love myself. It feels tough. Anybody that loves themselves is a narc and a liar. You've got to hate yourself a little bit to be good at anything. Fuck off. Okay, I think we have one or two more pills left. One or two more pills. What other ones? You got any fun ones? Any ones that you can do for recreational use? I mean, like a Xanax on an airplane is great. An Ambien on an airplane is great. Except for when you don't pass out. And then you're awake the whole flight to London on an Ambien. Well, first of all, the rule is you don't take a sleeping pill on a plane until the plane is off the ground. Yeah. That's the number one. Some say 10,000 feet. I mean, that's fine, too. But I think people get aggressive and they get comfortable in their little seat. I know Lucas is in 3A. He's got his feet kicked up. He already pre-ordered the sundae and his ass pops one. That plane's got a mechanical issue. I want that Mezzaluna. Is that bad? And then they turn that plane around. Yeah, that's tough. Also, the flight... Well, I guess from LA, the flight to London is long enough. The flight from New York to London is so short that it's almost... Yeah, that's six hours. Yeah, it's difficult to really feel good no matter what. Yeah. No, I like a little NyQuil. A little NyQuil and a glass of red wine is perfect.

cocktail to just pass right out he said he said over the counter bitch over the counter core seeding baby because when you didn't you say when your your first head changes were you would just like hit the whole pack of core seeding yeah core seeding they had a uh certain formula back in the day that they changed now because too many kids were getting high off of it but that was my that was my introduction to to drugs this is you're saying we we called that robo tripping Is that where you would just drink the whole bottle? I think it's the same. Yeah, you would just drink the whole bottle. Yeah, this was like – these were – capsules but i think it's the same thing and we just would take the whole sleeve of like 12 course lucas is so young that it was little capsules that did feel that did feel pointed that correction sorry i didn't mean it like that maybe it wasn't as popular in san diego no no no no honey there were just capsules imagine imagine imagine being able to get high that easily what a what a fucking gift what a time what a gift oh i miss those days me too chief me to take me back to 2007, baby. Take me back. Okay, so we're almost done filming this film. Is that correct? Yeah, I'm almost done. Got to do a little tour and then I'm going to come back here for another movie. He's booked and busy. He's trying. He's trying to get that pool in the backyard. But how come these movies don't pay anything? Can you do a movie that pays? Because nobody has money anymore. Is it TV? Is TV where the money is at? TV has money. TV is where it's at. I have a show. I did Prison Break, the reboot. What? Yeah. We're about to get picked up. Is the hot guy in it still? The guy that everybody loves? I wish Wentworth Miller was in it. Amazing hairline on that guy. One of the greatest hairlines to ever grace. So hot. Him and Kyle XY. Fuck. Isn't he gay? Yeah. That's so cool that he's gay. Wentworth Miller. Yeah. He looks like little Mikey. I know, but it was one of those things where everybody thought he was gay, and then when he was, it was like, bro, you delivered on the promise. Thank God. Yeah, thank God. Damn, he's 53. Still hot as fuck. I mean, I was probably in high school. Wenty. Yeah. I bet when that show was big. All right, so what are you playing in the Prison Break reboot? Down low trade. Not dropping the soap.

on this one i'm i'm not in the prison i'm i'm your ceo i'm i'm working for uh i'm working for i'm running for congress in the show and i'm hold on hold on you expect me you expect me to believe your ass is a congressman i'm a young congressman a young senator and but you're you're you're right wing right fuck yeah i am Okay, so you're a dope little congressman, but you have the – You got the red tie on. Just let him know. You got the red geek bar in your pocket because, yeah, I'm young and I'm different. Exactly. All right, so you play a young congressman. Yeah, he's running for the first time. Okay. Where is this base? Like what state, city? We filmed in West Virginia. The craziest... I'm a fucking 12 in West Virginia, let me tell you. I have never felt hotter in my life. Yeah, you gotta go Kevin Spacey mode. I know, I need to. I did watch some Housewives. Yeah, is Grindr illegal in West Virginia? I feel like they would firewall that shit. I don't know, I... I'm not going to lie to you. He didn't have to do that. He just had to go to the sit-go and smile, and they came fucking running. It was like cockroaches with some sugar water. That is sugar water. I think you playing young congressman, I can see it when the suit is on. I can see it. The suit's on. They got a little accent on there. I'm flirting with Margo Martindale. Okay. It's good. Okay, I like this. Margo Martindale. Did you have to learn policy and any sort of kind of political – how deep in the weeds did you have to get on local policy? How deep did I get? You know, I had to – I had to get a little familiar. I didn't really know a lot of what I was talking about when I first read the script, so I had to do a little homework. That's fine. You know, not too much. It's his first one. He's trying to follow in his daddy's footsteps, so he's kind of, you know. He's also a little clueless himself. The character's also. He's in over his head, yeah. He's definitely, yeah. And when does that come out? We find out if we're getting picked up this month. Who's the star? Who's, like, the main, the lead?

Do you remember Emily Browning from Sucker Punch, Baby Doll? No. No? Maybe? She's iconic. Oh, yeah. She's cute. She's super cute. So talented. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So we kind of changed the story a bit, and it's not so focused on the brothers, and it's from a different point of view. The showrunner, Elgin James, went to prison recently, or went to prison for a couple years after he did Mayans. Or before, I can't remember. To research for the show? To research for the show. She's going method. Exactly. He said, let me lock myself up for a bit and come back to TV. I still maintain I could do a year and come out better. You think so? My stepdad went for a year and he lost like 50 pounds and loved it. Minimum security? Yeah. Was it white collar? What did he do? Yeah, it was like tax. If you do a year for tax stuff, minimum security in Connecticut, I'm coming out ripped. I'm going to do 100 pull-ups. I'm going to read the Bible. I'm going to be ready to go. You got the Quran memorized. Oh, easy. Quran's first three months. Have that down. Have that down. And record an album. Okay, Lucas. Well, thank you for taking the time to chat with us. I wrote this for attention is a book. It comes out in a week or something, right? 14? It comes out in like three days. Yeah. Four days. And you read the audio book? Yeah, I read the audio book. If you hate reading, just fucking listen to it. And I know it's annoying if you're listening to it a couple days early to pre-order. I would never pre-order a TV show or a movie. It's very annoying. You got to pre-order a book. You got to support authors. You got to support me, guys. Come on. And Lucas doesn't give a fuck. He said, do it at Amazon. I don't care where you do it. I don't give a fuck. If you hate Bezos, do it on a fucking bookshop. Do it on any, wherever you want to do it. Just help a girl out. Kindle it. ebook it it's cheaper whatever i i think that i i it's so strange though that the publishing is i mean i guess the pre-save culture and music is pretty big but it feels different to me it doesn't feel as as important no i know it doesn't it really doesn't so go go pre-order the book um support lucas so you can get a pool when's your book coming out no good good question talk about that i mean i'm literally in florida alone working on it right now i've got a pile worst thing ever i got a pile of fucking

I got a highlight tonight. Yeah, it's a nightmare. Don't ever do this. Don't ever. I will never do this. Actually, I'll take that back. I'll maybe do it again, but in 10 years. If the money's right and the career goes well. If it makes any list, maybe I'll do a part two. No, you're coming in. McNally Jackson, it's going to be you, McNally, Ronson. You're at the top week one. Really? Yeah. I don't know. I have the same day as Kid Cudi, which I'm like, I'm fucked. Kid Cudi can't read or write, so you're fine. I think you're fine. I think you're fine for that. I can barely read. What's the biggest piece of press that you're going to do for this? I'm really excited to do the stuff with Julia Fox because I loved Down the Drain. I sent her the book and to get her to agree to do The Strand and do a couple other things for me to promote it is really exciting. Were you guys friendly before? We were friendly. not as friendly after i crawled under her at addison ray um no uh you're friendly enough to you're friendly enough to ask friendly enough to ask but then she's been fucking amazing on this and so helpful and uh Her bulk is so good, so we're getting tighter. Getting tighter with Julia. I'll see you guys on Tuesday. I wish I was there. I'm still going to be sequestered. See you, Jason? I will be there. That's okay. I saw Chris like three times, so I got to give Jason a little love, too. I noticed you were wearing your J. Crew jacket at the S&R show. It was nice to see that. Did you notice that? I wore my fucking outfit. Well, it has your initials on the back, so it lets people know you're walking away from them, which is a nice touch, I think. Sitting next to you and Martha Stewart. at that party was one of the highlights of my life yeah yeah it was a highlight of my life as well and i i'm i'm uh i don't think martha uh cared for me much you and martha still talk lucas we talked we had a we had a nice talk she was like she's a pro she's a fucking pro is she team follow back she talked to me and i i you know i'm not even gay i feel like when she talked

She looked hot. I know. She's hot. She looked fucking hot. I don't know when she... I feel like she doesn't really interface with straight guys very often unless they're like security guards. So I felt blessed. But you're like straight adjacent, kind of. Even her groundskeepers are good. The groundskeepers are shirts off, but gay. Oh, for sure. For sure. For sure. All right, Lucas. Thank you, guys. Go pre-order the book. Get the book. Good to see you, bro. Congratulations. Love you, guys. Best podcast. We'll see you soon. Thank you. Love you, bro. I'll see you on Tuesday. Yep. Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same premium wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities. So do like I did and have one of your assistant's assistants switch you to Mint Mobile today. I'm told it's super easy to do at mintmobile.com slash switch. Upfront payment of $45 for three-month plan equivalent to $15 per month required. Intro rate first three months only, then full price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra. Default terms at mintmobile.com.