070. - Chris Black & Jason Stewart

All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it three times a week. Jason, does that sound familiar to you? We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place. All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcast. or watch on YouTube. Want to make a podcast? Spotify's got a platform that lets you make one super easily, then distribute it everywhere, and even earn money. We like that. All in one place for totally free. It's called Spotify for Podcasters. And here's how it works. Spotify for podcasters lets you record and edit podcasts right from your cellular telephone or your computer. So no matter what your setup is like, you can start creating today. Then you can distribute your podcast to Spotify and everywhere else, those other places that podcasts are heard. Video podcasts are also available on Spotify. And when you want to take conversations with your fans to the next level, Q&As and polls are the best way to get them talking. With Spotify for podcasters, you can earn money in a variety of ways, including ads and... and podcast subscriptions. And best of all, it's totally free. Zero catch. We've been using it ever since we started How Long Gone. And ever since I discovered Spotify for Podcasters, I feel like having the option of turning off the Q&As and the polls on the user dashboard has really helped boost my creativity and take it to another level. I highly recommend giving it a try. Download the Spotify for Podcasters app or go to www.spotify.com slash podcasters to get started.

Hello, Chris. What's up, Lizard? Just, um, you know, Saturday. Weekend vibes only. It's a rare, um, how long gone Saturday recording. Uh, this is, this is something new for us. That's fucked up. Yeah, normally we record on Sundays for our Monday episode, but I'm going to be, I'm going to be on holiday. Jason going on a little local Cali vacay. Um, very happy for you. Thank you. I'm really trying to make sure that I use the time wisely and I'm actually not thinking about anything other than relaxation. Are you saying that you usually think about stuff? I'm saying that my brain is always going a mile a minute with all of my work back schedules and spreadsheets and all the plates that I'm constantly spinning. What's going on in the market? See how my nazi's looking? So I'm really going to make a point and an effort to truly unplug. Maybe, hopefully, not use my phone. Are you saying that you're not going to respond to any text messages from your podcast partner? I'm saying that I will have limited access while I'm on holiday. Hopefully. Because nowadays, there are no vacations, really. In this town, there's no such thing as a free lunch. But there's no real vacations going on. My life partner has scheduled three glorious holidays for us over the last number of months that have all been canceled due to natural disasters, COVID, etc. Yes, our original glamping expedition for tomorrow was canceled. Burned out? Due to arson. So from arson to novel viruses. It sounds like to me God is out to get you, TJ. It's like I think you might have done something bad and now this is karmic retribution. Well, God is out to get me. I mean, I guess it's more.

My partner than I, unfortunately. She's suffering from it much more than I am. You're saying God doesn't get her. I'm saying she needs to make right with her place with the Lord before we even pull up the orbits.com. So now that you're not glamping, it's more of a beach location? Going down to La Jolla. Just got a little casual telly. can go by the beach, you know, eat some Mexican food that white people made. Um, that sounds like your dream basically. It's only a couple hours from sunny Los Angeles, right? Yeah. And there's, there's an episode, you don't, you don't have to stop and charge the Tesla. Um, that remains to be seen, but, um, there, there's an episode of, of, What is the Bravo real estate show? Oh, Million Dollar Listing. Million Dollar Listing. Where there's an episode where the boys go down to La Jolla for a crazy property that, you know, it's a one-of-a-kind oceanfront blah, blah, blah. And it's like a real big, ugly, dumb house. And I looked on Google and the hotel we're staying at is right across the street. Wow, very cool. Can you send some pics, please? I'll be sending you some pics over. It's going to be some great curb appeal. The stories are going to be going ham with a lot of different front lawns and fountains and other things like that. I do have some deep San Diego-La Jolla connections, strangely, but I've never visited myself. I've been to San Diego, which was basically a bunch of army guys drinking beer, so I was good on that. Why do you have a connection? A Coke dealer or something, or what? No, just a bunch of people I know are from there. Eric Shaquine, photographer Eric Shaquine and Kelly, who I work with, Tom Brown. There's a bunch of people. It's just a weird crew of San Diego, La Jolla types that I know in New York. You can't trust anyone from San Diego, bro. Come on. I didn't know that. I mean, this is some local California stuff. No, no, no. I'm just kidding. I love to learn about it. I have San Diego fam. Don't worry.

Of course you do. Well, Mr. California, if you didn't, I mean, I would be remiss if you didn't have the squad. How's that? I wanted a little State of the Union update on that ankle of yours, Chris. I know there's a lot of health issues that I plan on covering today, but let's get started with a softball question with that ankle. It's feeling better. So I got those Nike 4% running shoes and I feel like they're retraining my body how to run and it's just going to be a painful process. It's kind of what I, because the first time it was giving me problems, it had been a previous. I'm just imagining you putting these shoes on and then like the scene of the hospital where you have the walker and you're having to learn how to walk again and they're like, Chris, can I? And you're like, no, I have to do it myself. That's, look, I don't know. I need to talk to more 4% users about the process. They're called 4%ers. Yeah, the other 4%ers. I'm feeling a little sluggish, and my ankle was giving me problems. But thanks to the plate in the shoe that propels you forward, my time is okay. So I can't tell if they're working and I'm just going to be in pain. A few people told me it's like it takes three or four runs to break in. So it sounds kind of like starting up a Wellbutrin prescription. You're not going to get the results overnight. Give it a week or two before you start really feeling these. You have to re-break those ankles. Yeah, and I'm not a big patience guy. So it's giving me problems, but they look very cool. So that's helping. You hate waiting. And I hate waiting. Yeah, we're an anti-JZ podcast. Jay-Z has a great new song out called Entrepreneur. Make sure to check that out on Tidal, baby. Straight to the fucking bin, mate. Garbage. The song is bad, but I was saying in the chat, the video did inspire me and move me.

Get TJ a little choked up. He's going to open a small business. I didn't watch the video. I only know what the video is because of you guys. I'm not going to watch it. If I don't like the song, I'm not going to watch the video. A video in 2020 is not going to trick me into liking a song. Well, I don't like the song. I did not get tricked into liking it, but I believe that that song is not a song and it is just a video that also has music attached to it. So you're saying Pharrell created a score for a three-minute YouTube clip? I'm saying Pharrell created a commercial for black entrepreneurship. And it looks like the video is an ad agency creation or a commercial less than an actual video, which is also kind of interesting of how advertising and creative agencies and all that stuff starts. We're so used to the way things look. Will that start affecting editorial projects like music videos or things like that? Which is terrible. I mean, that's like the end of everything. Well, I mean, all those videos are getting muddy from the sponsors. So it basically is an ad for something. Yeah, but before it was like, here's our idea for a video. It's going to be all this crazy weird stuff is going to happen and that's the idea that I came up with. But there's also going to be a bottle of alcohol in there and we'll do a product shot and that'll pay for the whole thing. But now, like the way that... They're edited and cut together and there's typography and closed captioning and it's all like Gin Lane design type. Entrepreneur video looks like Gin Lane made that video and it's a video for a new tampon company. Yeah, this is a new tampon that's going to disrupt the industry. It's by Jay-Z and Pharrell. Honestly, it wouldn't even surprise me at this point. Everybody's diversifying so much. It wouldn't surprise me if there's a direct-to-consumer product embedded in the video made by Gin Lane. That'd be pretty cool. A real synthesis of brands and ideas. But then art does not exist anymore. It's all just a product at this point.

Damn, Jason, that's deep. Russell, too deep for Saturday morning. Let's talk about your... Let's do a mental health check-in, Chris, since you want to get into it. We want to temp check State of the Union for Chris's mental. Do you think I'm unraveling? No, but interesting that you said that. I'll make a note. Chris is fucking good. No, because I was talking to my friend Andy. And we were discussing the podcast and stuff like that. And I was like, oh, what kind of subjects would you like us to cover more? And I always like to ask some people, you know, listeners in the DMs or whatever. I don't, but go ahead. If you have any, you know, what would you, you know, what would you like to see more of in the show? And if enough people say it. I think this is Jason, a fucking democracy. This is a goddamn, this is a dictatorship. It's me and you at the top. No, this is a combination. democracy and dictatorship. I don't know if you know how things work, Jason, but there's no combination of those two things. Yeah, it's called America. It's happening to us right now. Damn, Donald Glover voice. Yeah. That is one impression that you will never catch me doing. I don't know. I don't even know how you would impersonate Donald Glover. it's a tough one that's that's advanced subtle like being that corny i feel like is you either have it or you don't you know i feel like the guy i don't remember his name the one of the snl cast member who always does like all the hip-hop characters yeah he's not on anymore but yeah he was very good well this isn't i think his name is chris something i feel like he probably does a decent decent glover yeah he's he's he's pretty well he's he's well versed in all the rapper he did he did a bad kanye though Yeah, but it's like funny. Yeah, it's like funny. So yeah, so some people will say like, hey, you know, can you guys cover mental health issues? And I was like, that's a good idea. I will wait until Chris and I have our one-on-one pod so we can really get into it. I'm great. I'm good. I'm good, baby. No, I mean, honestly, it's like I think that...

Being out here with the sunshine, the wide open spaces, and my friends, and work is good. Life is good, honestly. I mean, obviously the impending doom of the world and all the awful stuff is happening, but I try not to let my mind be occupied with that too much because what the fuck am I going to do about it? You know what I mean? It's beyond my control, right? You are just one man. Speaking of life is good, some people thought that our new hat design was a flip from the life is good. clothing company that you might see at an airport? My dad's a big fan of Life's Good Clothing, actually. Maybe we can do a GQ story on them or something. It's unfortunate that people that listen to this podcast don't have respect for the Lemonheads and their classic album and can't recognize it from afar. The amount of people who would recognize that reference, who have recognized that reference, has been zero. No, I have people that recognize it. Oh, thank God. But they're, of course, like white males. Sure. So, so Callie coming out here, you, you have made a little piece, you have set up some roots. Are you, are you getting, are you getting in your full flow? I'm, I'm pretty in the flow. Yeah. To be honest, I'm in the flow. I mean, I think the amount of, the amount of exercise that I'm able to accomplish every day is, is pretty good for my mental. And then, I mean, I don't love seeing my therapist on the screen. You know, I find it, I've cut it back to twice a month instead of four times because I just don't find it quite as fulfilling. well it's it's hidden with with the condom on it's condom therapy yeah exactly and i i wonder how other people feel about it but i think it's like i mean what else are you going to do again it's like it's it's just that's the situation yeah you have to be hating it you make the best of it but i don't think anybody likes that more i mean i think that the thing about therapy that i liked is like the whole you know just like drugs like it's the whole thing like you walk there you do you know what i mean like the whole process i think for me it was in it was in union square so i could walk from my apartment it was kind of like a nice like whole you build your little wednesday around it you get your coffee here afterwards you grab a nice croissant or something much like much like this pod much like this podcast like i like to go into therapy blazing on being ready to spill my guts to luann

Um, but her name is Luann. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Luann's the best. And also Luann is, is it's interesting because she's like, she's, um, yeah, it feels very Southern, but she's not Southern at all actually. Um, so it's, it's, it's comforting in a, in a way that I like. Um, but yeah, no, I mean, look, everything's good. Alex is coming next month. I mean, I don't know. It's, it's like, I don't really find, I don't really find this, this whole thing. that stressful anymore which may be bad for me maybe i'm like not thinking about it enough but again i don't know what that's interesting what good maybe how long did it take for you to to start really letting living in california sink in or like really accept it um i mean immediately bro are you kidding me this is my flow yes i jump in i'm fucking driving it ain't nothing for me okay When I pull up to Sunset Tower in the Mozzie, maybe I live in California. You know what I mean? Ain't nothing. You saw the red leather. You know what the fuck's going on? No, but I just think that it's not that – I don't think that California is like super disconnected from reality. I mean it is and it isn't in this case. But I just think that like – sitting on the internet indoors and reading the news all day is just not really going to help me in any way. I think I get the information I need and I choose to digest that. But I think a lot of people are on the computer either tattletailing or doomscrolling. And those are two things that I would like to avoid with all of my might. You'll never catch Chris tattletailing like Megan Thee Stallion. Look. I'm not going to get into this, but I still need more context around the Megan Thee Stallion and Tory Lanez thing. I don't understand it. How long gone, listeners? If you were there at this cursed house party where Tory Lanez shot Megan Thee Stallion not once but twice in her feet, let us know. Do you understand it? Do you honestly understand it? Do I understand what exactly? Why it happened?

Well, yeah, why it happened, I mean, I think the only reason she even felt the need to say. Well, look, if you know Tori, you would get it, okay? Well, I mean, I know he's short and he's mad, but, I mean, do you think it had to do, do you think it was romantic and she was, like, not going to give it up and he got pissed? Do you think it was, like, what, I just don't understand. It's so, and her, I think she feels like she was forced to implicate him because people wouldn't leave her alone, and then him and his crew were, like, talking about it, which is also unfortunate, but I just don't, like. she's a superstar you know what i mean like what on earth was he thinking i think he i think it was maybe i mean the fact that it happened twice seems like that that knocks out the accidental excuse because also that's but also shooting somebody you know below the kneecap is you're trying to send a warning without killing somebody usually you know like mafia style Okay, Jason. Relax, okay, Jason. You're not from the streets. Don't try to mansplain the streets to me. This is not because I am from the streets, but I learned this just from watching mafia movies and things like that. Well, I guess that's exactly what rappers do, too. Especially ones from Canada. Yes, that's a good point. Yeah, I think that he was probably really, really, really fucked up. Something weird went down. Just one of those, you blink and what the hell just happened? Tory Lanez shot Megan Thee Stallion in the field twice. Is Tory Lanez canceled? It looks like it. I don't think anything is ever going to happen with him again. I think he's going to have to probably quit music and just hope that he lives. yeah i i kind of i agree with you i think he's which is kind of crazy because you know chris brown is is still cooking i was literally looking at a thread before we started this podcast about how like people still like the people defending chris brown were like going crazy because i guess like like well he admitted it and rihanna said she was part of it too and i'm like that doesn't make it okay

It does not make it okay. I mean, you know that they had to have had a passionate and tumultuous relationship. But, you know, if you put your hands on a woman. No, that's lights out. Yeah, it's a wrap. Even if Rihanna has welcomed him back into his life and recorded music with him after that. How are you feeling, DJ? I'm feeling like where everything is kind of on the cusp of something going on, which is giving me a little anxiety. What do you mean? Because your candidate, Donald Trump, could win again? Look, we're hoping. But I think it's partially what's going on in the world as a whole and then partially just my own personal life. in terms of job stuff, career stuff, pivots and what's going on. I was talking last night with some friends about what happens to... A lot of people will complain about why are these millionaire DJs throwing these events and making money. They don't need anything. They don't need another extra 5K or 10K. to do some weird... I don't think that's fair. Everybody wants more money. Fuck you. Well, yeah, but it made me think of all the people out there who are a working performer of some kind of DJ, for example, because that's where my background comes from. But those people who were making a decent living being a DJ and working events and having a nice life... That is over. Their whole life and career is fully over. Totally, totally. And they have nothing to fall back on. Like if you're a stand-up comedian, you're like, oh, I'm just going to start a podcast. I'm just going to write or I'm going to focus on my voiceover acting. There's 20 other things that you can do, but if the only thing you know how to do is play some cool music for drunk people at a party.

That's it. You're going to get an A&R job at a record label that's going to pay you what a 22-year-old would make or something. You're never going to become a music supervisor. No, you're not. None of those jobs are going to happen for you. That level of DJ that I know exactly, where there's no inroads. It's like, no, you were just kind of like a guy in your city and you were able to pull it together and make a living DJing four nights a week. But there's no career in that for you outside. That goes away. Yeah, and I think that it's teaching me or reiterating the importance of really being able to diversify your skills. So you mean you're patting yourself on your back for abandoning the EDM community in its time of need? That's 1,000% what I'm doing. Interesting, Jason. I'm not happy about it. I would say think of it as having the presence of mind to sell. to sell your stock before it plummets because you have seen it. That's a good example to use. Well, I mean, I think that, sure. It's exciting and it's frightening at the same time of every day, every week. I guess I have money right now and income is happening and those things. you know you you can never just rest rest assured that things are going to be okay for a while uh well i think that's proven i think that's that's proven but i mean i saw some stuff on twitter too about people being like a lot of people kind of at this stage being very happy about what the what the you know pandemic has has done for them personally obviously excluding like the the massive deaths and all the bad shit obviously i'm talking about on a personal level I think a lot of people have kind of like settled into it and it's given them like boundaries from work and kind of stuff that was just like, you know. Yeah, they're able to. Kind of like hitting a refresh on things. I'm able to get back into the garden and just really remember what's most important in my family and cooking good food. It seems, I mean.

It's awful, but like if people are feeling good about it, then I'm happy for them. I don't know if I'm feeling good about it necessarily, but I'm fine. Yeah, I don't know what I want to hear when I hear people talk about that. Do I want to hear them be super positive like that and say like, you know, all of this going on ended up being a blessing in disguise? Or do I want somebody to just be like, I hate that as much as I hate. I probably hate more when people are like. Freaking life sucks, man. Freaking post office is closing and these people don't wear masks. Let me talk about the post office for a second. Because you motherfuckers ain't ever used the post office and now this is your new cause and it's making me fucking crazy. Like, I know you motherfuckers didn't go to the post office. As a person who's been going to the post office since they were in high school, if you grew up in... if you grew up in hardcore and punk, you've been going to the post office since you were 13 years old. That was the lifeline to friends. That was a lifeline to getting new music, et cetera, et cetera. Like I love the post office. I'm not capping for the post office on Twitter. Like you fucking nerds. Like it's just such a, it's another like. I just can't believe it. It's like mourning a business you never went to. It's like Odessa in New York, that disgusting restaurant in East Village. You haven't been there in 15 years. What are you crying about? The reason they're going out of business is because you weren't going there. That is true. I mean, there's a lot of arguments that could be made why a privatized post office has its advantages. No, of course. No, no, no. Obviously, any support of the post office is good. I just think it's a funny new cause for people to rally behind for this week. I wonder if people are worried about the larger scale ramifications of what would happen if something like that just stopped happening. Like, oh, by the way, we don't have, you know how you have gas in your house? We just couldn't figure out how to do it, so now we're just going to cancel having gas. It's a utility that is being canceled, so then you're like, what's going to happen next? Is everything going to become privatized? People are worried about it because it's another cause for liberal elite people to get behind, and they want their Amazon packages on time.

Like that's, let's be honest, like that's what's going on. Like you don't, you don't, you're not worried about jobs. You're not really worried about voter suppression. Like maybe you are, you know what I mean? But like it's, it's, it is an institution and maybe the, the, the idea of an institution going away is just jarring for people, which I, that I understand because it is an institution, but I just find it like. It's just a funny thing to get behind. But it's important. I care about the post office. I went and bought stamps. I didn't post a receipt on Instagram because I'm not a cuck. It is a shame and it's frustrating that we're the most powerful country in the world, or we were at least. We invented a postal service and it worked well for hundreds of years. Literally hundreds of years. And now they're just like, yeah, we can't figure out. how to like, like the government can't, can't do it. And I think the government is purposely not doing it. I mean, I do think it's, it's some nefarious behavior going on. But it's been, I mean, it's been fucked for a long time. But I think that there's certain people in power that would have just made it work because they understand the institution of it being important. You know what I mean? And now there are people who are like, we don't give a fuck because there's a reason we could, if we get rid of this, this could benefit us in some way. You know what I mean? It seems like what's happening, but I mean, look, I love the post office. I think that the real issue here is receipt posting. It has been something that has really fucking rubbed me the wrong way in the last six months. And I just think it's so uncouth and tacky. So what you're saying is if you liked it, then you should have put a stamp on it. That's not what I'm saying, Jason. I will hang up. That's a good lyric. You should sell that to the post office. Maybe they had some catchy Beyonce flips they could stay in business. When those words left my mouth, I was very upset with myself. What if we started posting receipts for everything we do just to prove to people how supportive we are? Every time we go to an independent business, I post a receipt of it to show that I went to an independent business. Do you think people would think that's annoying or do you think they would pat me on the back?

They would absolutely pat you on the back. If we did that all the time, we would get hundreds of thousands of likes and retweets and follows. It's the corniest shit on planet Earth. Of course, we are out here supporting small businesses. I've always done that. We've always done that. As a super spreader, it's kind of what we do. Exactly. No, as an upper middle class white privilege haver, that's what you do. You pay more for things from a local business. That's what we do. As an experiment, Chris, every time you buy food from a restaurant when you're out there spreading, when you get the check, you write a 50% tip on there instead of 20. And then you write one of your little sayings or something, and then you post it every time and be like, yo, if you're not tipping at least 50%, You're fucking trash, and you're not a real American. This is a good idea. Your followers will go up. You're going to get some great engagement. You know where that would have been a good place to start was independent business Boa Steakhouse. Give it up for the little guy. Give it up for the little guy. Boa Steakhouse. If Kismet was cool, welcome to Boa Steakhouse. All right, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Quince. Jason, the temps are warming up. It's getting hot out there. Summer always changes how I get dressed. I need pieces that feel lighter, more breathable, and that are just easy but still put together. I don't want to look like a slob. That's why I keep coming back to Quince. They focus on high-quality essentials that feel and look amazing. Breathable linen and soft organic cottons. Well-made basics but without the luxury markups. That rare balance where everything feels elevated. but still effortless. Yeah, Chris, linen season is here. I wore a linen blazer to dinner a few nights ago in the warm California sun. But, you know, you got that Italy trip coming up this summer and quality European linen pants and shirts.

Upgrade that look starting at just $34. You know, if you get a nice linen suit, a little t-shirt underneath it, some chill shoes, you're looking good, but you're staying cool. The inside of your special areas are nice and dry as you turn up with your besties. So elevate that summer wardrobe. Go to quince.com slash how long for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns, even on a nice holiday now available in Canada. That is Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash how long. That'll get you free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince punto com slash how long. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Squarespace. Obviously, Jason, you and I spend a lot of time on the World Wide Web. So do our peers, our listeners, our friends, our colleagues. Obviously. Maybe even your parents if they're freaky. And if you're doing anything in the world. writing, taking pictures. I do topless boxing. You need a website. Exactly. A website that works, that does what it's supposed to do, that allows you to be creative, but also business minded. Jason, there's one place to go for that. Squarespace. Yeah, Chris, I'm over here. I'm modifying calculators and putting Claude inside of them so you could cheat at school. And I just want a place where I could, you know. have everything all in one place. I can have the SEO tools. So those future graduates can find me and, you know, I'm able to accept quote unquote donations for my services that might be gray area. You know what I mean? And then email campaigns. Hey, I got a new up, you know, 2.3 version upgrade. Boom, boom, boom. Get the analytics going, raise some money. Show your investor all of your cool analytics of what's going on. They're going to want to get in early. And we can use Blueprint AI to make your website look as professional as your competition, if not more. So head to squarespace.com slash howlong for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code howlong to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. Oh, this is huge for me personally. This episode of How Long Gone.

It was brought to you by TaskRabbit. Oh, baby, let me tell you something. This is not a joke. I use TaskRabbit a lot because I can't do anything. You need some art hung? TaskRabbit. You need something put together? A cabinet? Got to reach that cheese grater on the top shelf? TaskRabbit. Anything you need, TaskRabbit can take care of it for you. How it works, TaskRabbit connects you with skilled taskers in your area. They can help you move. They can assemble furniture, repairs, yard work, mounting, and more. You can search for a tasker based on cost, skill set, availability, and past client reviews so you know exactly who's showing up and can have confidence that they know what they're doing because taskers have assembled over 3.4 million pieces of furniture, completed 700,000 home repairs. handled 1.5 million moves, and the numbers are just going up, Jason. Yeah, throw a little money at the problem. It's not so expensive. And that job that you really don't want to do is something that another person out in the world is very good at doing and would gladly do it in exchange for a little bit of money. So when life happens, your to-do list grows. Get ahead of it now and get $15 off your first task at TaskRabbit.com or grab the TaskRabbit app using promo code how long taskers book up faster, especially for same day tasks. So book trusted home help today. That is $15 off your first task using promo code how long with the TaskRabbit app or at TaskRabbit.com. Which we, you know, we chose to visit on Thursday evening. Jason, myself and our compatriot, Decatur Dan pulled up. We had to invite somebody else who actually has been there unironically. Yes, exactly. We wanted someone who truly goes for the food and ambiance, not guys who are going to see TikTok hotties and a TMZ cameraman. He's there to get the steak for two, a warm cookie, and the phone number of the hostess who brought you to the table. Exactly.

From a purely aesthetic standpoint, it is absolutely disgusting. Well, I mean, the outside of it is pretty nondescript, though. Agreed. And overall, I would say, let's just start with an overall. What would you rate the experience? I would rate the experience an 8 out of 10. Surprisingly. I'm with you, TJ. I'm with you. I think... Yeah, I mean, where do we even begin? I did write some notes down. I thought I saw you taking notes during dinner and I was stunned, but also appreciated your dedication to the craft. Well, you know, don't be stunned. I take podcasting very seriously, Chris. That's unfortunate. As an online journalist. So, yeah, you go there, you valet out front. It's right by Soho House on the Sunset Strip. where it's kind of right at the end of the Sunset Strip. And I think it's the reason why it's really successful and flourishing right now is it's the closest thing to a club that you can get to right now. Yeah, I would. Well, I mean, a friend of ours, Lino, wrote a story about it for The Face that came out on Friday, actually. And it's just like... Gen Z's biggest names flock to the restaurant for comped overcooked steaks so they can get paparazzi outside, which is exactly what's happening. But I don't think that – I thought the food was actually fine. The food was fine. I'll do a full food review, don't worry. But I want to talk more on the philosophy of why that it has become a TikTok celeb hangout. Go ahead. For clubs and restaurants, especially in Hollywood, they really have these life cycles where after a certain amount of years or months even, you have to rebrand and start a new name and redo all the core and everything because the attention span of everyone is down. Maybe that will be a new way of extending the life of a restaurant. You have the first year where it's all celebs and then you start letting in.

you know ugly people and fat people for year two and then for year three then you start having urban parties there and then for year four you start in telling tiktok people we will give you free food if you come here and post and then you get like maybe two more years out of it because pricing pricing wise it wasn't insane it was it was not it was not overpriced it was a little overpriced but It was not as expensive as I thought it was going to be at all. How would you describe the crowd? I would say the crowd was all bad people. Everyone there was a scammer or a rich, hot high school person. All the people that were older than 24 were involved in some type of crime that involves like importing jewels or something like that. No, it could just be some classic credit card scamming. You know what I mean? It might not be as advanced. Yeah, it could be a little bit of that. But it's definitely like a plastic surgery, Yeezys, like that's the vibe. The overall vibe is that. And I think that, you know, halfway through the meal, I was perplexed because I didn't see any TikTok types in my purview. And I did a lap around the restaurant and then – You masked up and then took a lap. Exactly, and then thank God, six hottie TikTok males sat down across from us, and I was able to observe them in their natural habitat. Yeah, it was very much like an entourage, the TV show style gathering of dudes. The fellas. There was the fat one, there was the hot one, there was the old one, there was like the little pipsqueak one. But they're all pretty hot, that's the thing. They're all pretty hot except for the fat one, though. The fat one that had the McQueen's on, he had strong Jewish dad lawyer vibes going on. If you're wearing the McQueen's, you're roasted. You're toasted. Go home. He's roasted and toasted. Roasted and toasted. We were able to observe them, and they did have that uniform look of a black t-shirt.

Yeah, the uniform look seemed to be actually like a plain white tee, a regular kind of skinny pant. Maybe Amiri. They could have been Amiri's. So, yeah, like one of Amiri's more tasteful selections. Exactly. Something like Jason. Jason gets the custom of Amiri's because when he's making them. for NBA players, he just breaks Jason off a few because, you know, same height. Let me hold a 42 inseam real quick. Let me hold the Grateful Dead joints with the fraying and a 42 inseam. Thank you, King. Yeah, it was like a white or black t-shirt. Yeah, the plain white t-shirt or a black t-shirt, you know, some type of low profile, nice designer jean, and then a statement shoe. which is always bad. Always bad. Yeezys, Off-White Converse, McQueen's. And then there also was two chromie truckers, thank God, which is the chrome trucker hat seems like maybe the official garment of that kind of guy. And there was some chromie jewelry as well. Those guys like a light ring, a little bracelet, a chain. How old do you think these guys were? 20 to 24 and they were all um they had no they had no problem like hugging each other sitting right next to each other well jason when you live together in a hype house you can do that you're already you know and also i just want to point out there are no women around them at all no women whatsoever it's just the bros It's just the bros. Much like it was fellas night at BOA for us, maybe it was fellas night for them. But the real disappointment, I would say, was that there was no paparazzi outside. Hollywood Fix wasn't there. TMZ wasn't there. So I'm a little bit like, were these guys not big enough or were they just like LA rich kids whose dad worked in the music business? I don't know.

That's the problem now is you can't tell who is a TikToker and who is just like a regular shitty rich high school kid. Yeah, because they're just hot. They didn't have their fingernails painted or anything like cool. So, you know, I don't know. These guys could be, you know, second year students at USC. They all had strong USC vibes. But I think, anyway, but the crowd, as you can imagine, was torched. The crowd was very torched. Our waiter, though, I quite liked, and you made a little local Cali joke to him, and he came back with a nice retort. Yeah, he had a Kato Kaelin energy. Very Kato Kato with a face shield. He looked like he had been working there as a waiter who makes a pretty decent chunk of change at BOA for a while. He seemed like a lifer where... He's an actor and it didn't quite work out for him. And now he's a boa boy. And he does a good job. He was great. I liked him in general. The service was good. Again, the food is pretty good. Overall, break down the order. I don't really remember it. Yeah, I think for me the food, I've been trying to figure out what the vibe is because it's not just like a full shithole place. I was looking on their Instagram. They have ingredients that are... sort of thoughtfully sourced like their burgers made on a martin's potato roll which is the same one that shake shack uses you can't get it in in california you have to like order it from back east so like they're they were they're being sort of thoughtful about certain things it reminds me of of kind of like cheesecake factory for rich people yeah that's a that's a that seems uh it's it's like this the same amount of like um i guess food creativity and thoughtfulness and crowd and culture as as the cheesecake factory which is you know pretty low pretty low in the totem pole um but just higher price points but comforting american steakhouse food that costs a little little money but less than you thought it was going to be we uh

We could not get the table-side Caesar because of the novel coronavirus, unfortunately. And then Gene's favorite, which I know he's crushed. How was the Caesar on a scale of 1 to 10, Jason? Caesar was sort of the only chink in the armor for that menu. A Caesar misfire. It was a misfire. I will say no chef to the Caesar. Because at a steakhouse place like that, you're hoping for a little bit of a razzle-dazzle. You're hoping for a statement ingredient piece like some... Some anchovies that are filleted and laid out nicely on there. You're saying you would want a place like this to do a twist on the Caesar or just the ingredients should be better and displayed? Because the Caesar is such a classic archetype. You don't want any deviation from the formula. You don't want the deviation, but I think the... It's a very, very regular-ass Caesar. It's not bad. It's not good. It's just there. It's a morning Tuesday's-ass shit. It's a Caesar that I could have got any restaurant in the world. But I think they used to do it table-side, so that was part of the presentation and the wow factor. That's a placebo effect to make you think the salad is actually better. Right. So at a place like that, you want to have a lot of flair, very salt-based style. We're just doing regular food, but... It comes out and some guy with a mustache pulls a sword out and cuts the thing. And then there's a gold leaf. This failed actor brought the anchovies out, so you should like it more. So they should have added a little flair to it or something. Because it was a very regular ass Caesar. Especially when it's like $18. The bread, on the other hand, which I did partake in because it was a bad boy night, was delicious. It was like a dinner roll scenario, kind of like a mini ciabatta that had some rosemary on top of it. Rosemary. It was rosemary. Okay. The rosemary flavor was a little strong, but I was fine with it. It appeared to be baked from frozen, which is fine. I'll allow that. And the butter was nicely room temp. Not too hard. Yes. Yeah, it wasn't. Hard butter, you know we hate that. Hard butter was bad.

You and Dan shared some giant piece of animal. I didn't really understand what it was, but it was fake-ass Peter Luger, right? Yeah, we did a steak for two that was served Brooklyn style, which is basically them doing Peter Luger. The only time I go to Brooklyn is when I go to Brooklyn. Yeah, exactly. What they do it Peter Luger style, they grill that T-bone steak up and then they slice it on the bone and put it in the platter and then they sizzle it in the broiler with a bunch of butter. They bring it to the table and then they pour, the waiter pours like a cup, like a literal cup of butter all over it. It was honestly hard to watch. I mean, I got some real nasty meat sweats afterwards. I could feel my artery. I forgot to mention that I know that you guys think I wear the same shirt every day, but I actually changed clothes and put on some pants for this because I knew it was a faux nice place. Of course, we walk up and the security guard points out that Jason shouldn't be wearing shorts, but he allows us to go in anyway with our reservation. The security guard who was wearing a blazer. over a t-shirt and then he had a face mask on that said security across it in massive letters so it's just this big giant scary guy staring at me with you know a five inch tall security letter face mask it looked it was hard not to laugh at him and he said it in a very cool way of just like we're trying to move away from shorts a little bit bro yeah he had a nice he had a nice way of phrasing it um But I had a piece of salmon that was actually nice, and they put the fucking butter on the side, so of course it didn't partake. But the real hit for me was like a broccoli mash. You like the broccoli mash? So that's where you take broccoli, you put it in a food processor with some salt and some butter. It's basically baby food, right? It's literally baby. I mean, it's just mashed potatoes, but you use broccoli instead of potatoes. I mean, it's not bad for you.

But the regular mashed potatoes were quite good too. The mashies were hitting. You were also able to get lobster mashed potatoes where they fill an emptied out lobster tail with the mashed potatoes that has chunks of lobster in it. That seems a bit much to me. It's just, no, no, no, no. I really liked their, I got a dirty martini and the waiter was like, would you like with an olive? or a blue cheese olive i had to hit the blue and it was a delicious blue cheese olive uh martini on anything i could get at lowry's steakhouse i love that well i mean overall i get yeah like i said i get the experience at eight of ten i don't i mean you know besides the only thing that could have helped the experience is more tiktokers and paparazzi right Yeah, I mean, I wonder if we're too late and there's a new boa. No, no, no. I don't think we're too late. I think maybe it was just an off night. There were a lot of hotties, though. There were a lot of hotties, for sure. One thing I did notice, there was a table across from us. It was like two guys and a woman. They said grace before they ate their meal. Not the appetizer, but when the main course came out, they all waited until everyone's steak was there. People are so stupid. What the fuck? There's nothing more embarrassing than praying to no one before a meal at BOA. The only thing I'm praying for is more views on my TikTok. That's the only thing I'm praying for at BOA. But overall, yeah, it was a good experience. It was nice to just be out with the lads. And honestly, it felt pretty safe, I have to say. I think another reason why Boa is so popular in quarantine, not only does it look like a club, but it has an indoor-outdoor floor plan for the dining room. So it already was an outdoor restaurant, so they didn't have to do anything to it.

they just put up the the plastic screens between tables but overall it feels it's definitely the most real feeling restaurant and i think that does help it as far as like you're not on the sidewalk yeah they didn't have to alter it or you're not you're not getting like the covid version of it other than other than the waiters wearing a mask it was an exact same replica one thing i did want to note was I was surprised about the music. The music at these restaurants is always kind of old. They were playing Bulletproof by LaRue and MGMT Kids. Which I teared up during because I had a Molly flashback. But do you think these people that were born in 2003 know what any of that is? No, but I think that the music at a place like that, as long as it's upbeat, it just doesn't really matter. Look, as long as the restaurant's not playing rap music, I'm happy. Yeah, do you think they have a no hip-hop rule there because they already have a rapper problem at BOA? I mean, if they have a dress code, they definitely have a no hip-hop rule. Those two racist tropes go hand in hand. But I do think that music at places like that doesn't matter. But I also saw you light up when LaRue came on. And I looked over to you, and we smiled at each other, and I asked you, How many times have you played this and you just grinned and said, Chris, countless. It's true. RIP LaRue, wherever you are. They did have, when the steaks came out, we had the all silver, the triple silver Laguli steak knife, though, which was a nice touch. Triple silver? Did you get a triple silver with your little fish fillet? Yes, I did, actually. I got the same shit you got. I didn't recognize it as triple silver. What kind of runts is that? I don't know. I'm not familiar. The triple silver, I've never seen it before. It's a little bit of an alpha male selection. Good to know when I'm buying you flatware. I'll remember these important tips that you're sharing. I think in the future, I will go back to Boa, though. I'm a little curious to try.

Yeah, I guess. It was weird because I felt like – I went to West Hollywood two nights in a row. I went to Erewhon and then I went to Boa. And it couldn't be – Welcome to the Chris Black circuit, baby. You already know. Welcome to Hollywood. I type in on my ways, like I'm heading over to you to go do this from my house. It's like a 19-minute drive or something like that. Quick drive. Quick drive. A quick drive. And it is a completely other world. It's so – foreign to my you know and i i don't live far away i live in a suburban ish part of la but i'm not like super deep in altadena or sherman oaks or some shit you know i'm around but it is you have a sherman you have a sherman oaks mindset though so maybe that's what's really throwing you for a loop fuck you bro i'm living hills up top i would but it's just The rest of the world is happening and I feel like I'm in a different world now. My day-to-day life, it has none of this action that I really used to be a part of all the time. Going out to dinner a few nights a week, having some drinks, we're going to hit this bar afterwards. Real socializing, seeing people who are wearing... crazy cool outfits or bad outfits or seeing really hot people or like fucked up weird cars or just influencers or celebrities like i don't see any of that at all i mean in my life so you're saying that you're saying that this week my inviting you to west hollywood twice has changed your life basically it did change my life it made me remember what what the worst part of LA was life. But you're saying because of the current situation, the worst part of LA is actually appealing to you and it's hurting you. Kind of, yeah. To me, it's my version of going to Disneyland or something where you can just hop in this little time machine and boom, here they all are. I don't even know if I like it or hate it.

or something, but there is something that will never... It'll always be nice and cool to just cruise down Sunset Boulevard with the windows down, blasting a SIG and playing some Spotify. That's never going to get old. You're damn right it's not, Jason. I need to do that more often. I need to remember that part about it because I really am quarantined out here in Glendale. I don't really participate in much of that stuff besides Erwan frequently. But I think that they were very lucky because their hot bar was always behind glass and served by employees. So they've been able to be open the entire time, whereas Whole Foods had to shut all that shit down. They did. As soon as everything hit, which I think is a pretty interesting luck of the draw. It is, but the social distancing at the Erewhon cattle call waiting line where 48 people are ahead of you to get some slop into a biodegradable bamboo box for $23, it was laughable. I think it's a good solid 50%, right down the middle, 50-50 split of people who, really care about the coronavirus and masks and social distancing and testing. And the other 50% are just like, this is bullshit. I don't care anymore if it's real or not or it's a hoax or whatever. And they all are starting to kind of gather with each other. And you can see neighborhood by neighborhood what it is. Like when you're in Silver Lake, which I don't really like Silver Lake anymore, but nobody is doing that really. It's like everyone is a social distancing god and they're really killing it at wearing a mask and all of that stuff. I mean, bro, that's not true. You go walk around the reservoir, there's a fucking hundred people rubbing shoulders with each other. They're not rubbing shoulders with each other. They're walking outdoors on a big ass.

i mean look i don't give a fuck i'm just telling you i know i know but but like you can kind of see like the collective spirit on the streets of like we we don't care we don't give a fuck we think this is dumb versus like i am very serious about wearing a mask and social distancing i mean i feel like everybody's serious about wearing a mask here i never see people without masks in la like ever i see it constantly all the time yeah i rarely i mean i honestly rarely see it like in an inappropriate way if it like you know what i mean like i would because they won't let anybody in anywhere and like walking down the street i mean people were running with masks on that's why i get up and fucking early and run alone because i'm not i'm not running with a mask on that's fucking crazy well it's and when i was saying it's different for every neighborhood this is proving my point where we know wherever you're spending most of your time people are wearing the mask and wherever i am they aren't and That is interesting, actually. Yeah, but as time has progressed in the quarantine and now that we've been wearing masks for months and months now, even when somebody is wearing a mask, you can tell when they're doing it proudly versus begrudgingly. Like, I hate doing this. I'm going to intentionally put it on the wrong way. And I wish you would tell me that I am wearing it sideways or it's not covering my nose. because I would love to yell at you and say some QAnon shit or whatever. I think we're going to get more and more of that, of people, I mean, of just like, I really don't care, or I really do care, too much. It's really divided. Yeah, the in-between is tough to find. I will agree with you there. It's either I drive a Prius and only listen to NPR and haven't seen anyone in six months, and I wear a mask when I fucking sleep. Or it's like, is the hookah place open? I don't give a fuck. You're right. I mean, honestly, that is kind of what it's like, I think. But I guess, are we in the middle then? Are we COVID moderates? I think people like us are, because we know how serious it is, but we also know that we're getting a lot of information and who knows what's what. You know what I mean? So it's like, I think, and it's also like, I think we're probably the most social.

you know, more social than most people do. So that is hurting, like we're missing that greatly. Yeah, one thing I have noticed as time has also progressed is when you have those, you know, backyard hangs and social distance fiestas and shit, how, you know, one month ago or two months ago, you would show up at somebody's house and you have the mask on and you're only going into the backyard and it's like very weird and everyone's sitting apart. And every week since then, it's just less and less, less and less. And the more time you spend with people without dying from coronavirus, the less and less you're really going to care. And now whenever I'm in a backyard with somebody or hanging out with friends, if someone's not wearing a mask and you walk past them, you're like, whatever. You punch them in the face and tell them to get the fuck out of your house. Before, everyone was really like, oh. Oh, six feet, six feet. And now people just kind of stop caring. Or if you're going to go into somebody's house, you're like, I'm going to put on a mask and I'm going to put gloves and I'm going to ask permission if I can go use your bathroom. And now people just do it without asking. They just don't care. I saw an old man in the park yesterday walk up to a pull-up bar. put a plastic bag over like a single plastic bag over both of his hands and do 10 pull-ups and then walk away. No mask on. I'm like, bro, what the fuck are you doing? Like, what are you doing? People are so fucking weird. But that's the problem is that that's the whole issue is that like with no leadership and no hard information, it's like, everybody's like, I'm going to wear gloves forever. I'm going to wear a mask forever. I'm not, you know, there's, there's no right. There's just, there's no one can agree on what's right and what's wrong and what's extreme and what's not. In the future, post-vaccination, what situation are you going to wear a mask in? Hopefully none. Hopefully none. So, like, the next time you're on an airplane, you're not going to wear a mask if you don't have to. Yeah, no, of course not. Yeah, I don't, I mean, I think that, yeah, unless I need to to protect myself and other people, I will not. But maybe, again, if, I guess, I don't know. I mean, I do think that there's, like, a respect issue, and that's part of,

the reason that I wear a mask, I think is like, I understand that like it could make other people not only sick, but also uncomfortable. You know what I mean? So I'm like, I'm going to wear a mask because that's, that's what we need to do for the collective work for you to do that. Yeah. It's like, that's what we need to do for the collective work of society, you know? So that's fine. I can do that. If I need to do that for the next two or three years on an airplane, then yeah, I'll do that. That's fine. It's not that big of a deal. Well, I was asking because there are certain situations where when I am wearing the mask, I'm glad about it, like going to a supermarket or being around just a bunch of shitty, nasty people. I'm actually excited sometimes and grateful that I am masked up because I don't want to be breathing the same air as these mongrels. And I don't know if that's a practice that I will... stop doing once once i don't have to legally do that i mean it's i don't know if it'll ever go away you know what i mean it might this might be you know at least in in major metropolitan areas like this could be the future forever yeah yeah i i think i think there could be some some positives to it no agreed agreed i don't i don't think it's i i just the people like you know that video i sent you of the guy leaving like the grocery store and he gets in his truck and he like takes his mask off so mad like that shit is absolutely insane like if you can't handle a little discomfort then then your your life has been too easy um yeah i guess that's just america in general bro we've had it ain't that america um speaking of america just just a quick positive note before we get out of here okay let's go The new Killers album. Jason, oh my god. Speaking of America, is the Killers album titled something? No, it's just they're the last great American rock band. That's just how I think about them. They're our U2. They're from the heartland. They're from the heartland of Las Vegas. I honestly really needed this to be good and it's good. I'm very happy. You did need this to be good because there's a strong chance that a 2020

killers album couldn't could have a couple stinkers on there it could be in a direction that exactly but it it it it it's a it's part sam's town which is my favorite killers album and one that got panned by critics but it's like a fan favorite which is always interesting i think that's your kid a That is my kid A, exactly. But it has all the Springsteen U2 vibe, but maybe a little War on Drugs, which I like, actually. But I think there's a similar producer or something. But the features are Lindsey Buckingham, which is insane. From Fleetwood Mac. From Fleetwood Mac, yes, sorry. I was going to say it, and I was like, I think everybody knows who that is. But you know what? You know what? Bill Hader does a great impression of him on What's Up With That. He does do that. And then Wise Blood, which is like new and cool. And then the best one, Katie Lang, who absolutely kills the vocal. So Lang can sing. Yeah, exactly. What did you say before Katie Lang, a new cool person? Wise Blood. What is Wise Blood? It's some like cool guy shit. You don't know. It might be like a, it's not like my favorite thing, but it might be sub pop. I don't know. It's like a female singer. I'm out. Where is it? Oh, no, I'm sorry. Yeah, some pop actually. Damn, I guessed that right. That's fire. Oh, man. Wow. But overall, the record's good. I was so happy that it was good. They had four songs out and pushed back a bunch because of coronavirus, etc. What's the record called? The record is called Imploding the Mirage. Imploding the Mirage? What the fuck is that? That better be a double entendre for the hotel. It is, I believe. Yes. Yes, it is. Did they blow up the Mirage Hotel? Let me look here. Some good pod right there. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I think they did. Fuck yeah.

Damn, another case closed. Yeah, I would highly recommend it to all our listeners. It's really slapping. Slapping. Chris has a birthday coming up in a few weeks, as do I. I believe, Jason, Virgo season actually started today. Is today the beginning? I thought I felt something going on. Did you feel our powers increase? Well, I noticed it the most when I could notice my girlfriend looking at me like, oh, God, here it comes. She knows. You know when it's earthquake weather? Same kind of thing. There's Virgo weather. Bitch, it's about to be a earthquake. TJ's about to be cooking for the next month and a half. How long does Virgo season last for? Do you know? Is it just one month? Month and a half. Well, your birthday is the 4th? Mm-hmm. Damn. It's about to be a movie, bro. What do people do for their birthday in COVID? I think we should do, Jason. I think we should fill a super sucker up with piss and soy milk and go spray it on people not wearing masks. I think that's what we should do. Okay, I think we should. I'm down to do that. Maybe we can do a video where we wear a suit and then we go to a place where a bunch of people. who love Trump are at and we can interview them about wearing masks and make them look dumb. Are you talking about that cornball who does that already? There's a few cornballs who do it. They went to Huntington Beach and then they did another one. I think it's called vice.com. They went to Florida and they just put like a dorky white guy in there with like a bunch of blacked out party people. So they say funny stuff, which I guess then you could watch it at home and be like, I'm not as bad as those people. Yeah. I mean, that's what all this is about is like, am I as bad as these other people? And what makes me feel good and self-righteous is really the world we're living in. It's fucked up. It's fucked up, Jason. But you know what, bro? Look, we're in Cali. Our mental health is good. The pod is rolling. We're playing tennis. We're getting these workouts in. We're looking tan.

And, you know, Jason, the season's about to change. Not just Virgo season, maybe, but fall, the best season. And even though it's going to be 100 degrees in L.A., mentally, it changes for me. You know what I mean? Well, when you live in L.A., fall happens in January, just to let you know. Oh, so it's a little delayed. Yes. Summer is on its way out around Halloween is the end of summer in L.A. And then when March comes, winter will come as well. I can't wait, man. Yeah, you know. So if our listeners have any ideas of what we should do for the B-Day, Virgo season birthday, please send them over because I don't want to just, you know, have four people in my backyard with like a cute looking cake. Oh, for my birthday, I'm already on it. I'm talking to, I'm going to get Tim to hit Bia and we're going to get Delilah private. You know what I'm saying? We're going to rent out Delilah. We're going to round Delilah. Everybody has to stay six feet apart. Them jeans DJ set, all Britpop. I think it could be a movie. I mean, that could be, and we could go live if we want and get some tips and stuff. Okay. I want to hire some type of celebrity influencer to do the temperature forehead check at the door. Damn, great idea. We can hire the guy, the mini me impersonator to do the temp check and you got to get down to your hands and knees. That's a great idea. I know he's not working right now. That's a great idea. I mean, we could. I think after our Brandon Wardell episode, I've learned that Cameo is a way to connect. It is a great way to connect with celebs in your area. And you can be like, hey, Mark McGrath, here's an extra 50. Can you come over and check the temperatures on the floor? Look, I know you're a multi-millionaire, but you're bored, bro. Come on. Why are these people... That's the real, real digital panhandling. You have millions and millions and millions of dollars. Why are you taking the time to make a little extra $200, $300? This is what I don't understand about people, Jason. And this is the line of thinking where you get it wrong. In our capitalist society, the rich want to be richer. Think about the amount of effort it takes to record a 30-second cameo and you get paid $200. The effort-to-payment ratio is so good that how could you say no? Because it could...

damage your career in the long run and also the emotional embarrassment and toll that you have for literally like jiving for being a celebrity is embarrassing that's the whole thing it's embarrassing but you get rich so you're just able to deal with it that's the whole thing also these people i like mark mcgrath i think he's funny mark mcgrath is not a celebrity like he he can't not do this Yeah, but the amount of money that he's made in the last 15 years from hosting television, those are huge. He has millions and millions of dollars. But you're also forgetting that celebrities are desperate for attention and need validation at all times. That is true. That is very true. You can get validation. You can make a little coin to fucking pay your staff. You know what I mean? So you don't have to dip into your residuals. And you stay relevant with a new crowd of people. And also, I think a lot of them... are honestly in on the joke. I think they know what's going on. I don't think they think it's anything more than it is. To me, the risk to reward... What is the risk? The risk of being embarrassed. If I'm a celebrity, I only have so many hours in the day to do all of my stuff. Am I really going to block out two hours to be like, hey, Stephanie, I heard it's someone's birthday. And then it gets posted on social media and then it goes viral and everyone's laughing at you. And you're like, wow, none of this would have happened if I didn't want that extra $75. This being said, how much do you guys can make on Cameo? A day? A month. A month. You can probably make about $350 on Cameo. Okay. Well, I think for my birthday, I'm going to sign up for Cameo. Yeah, but so will you... Oh, they have to ask me though, I think. So will you record 35 videos for $10 per month for $350? And then I'm sure cameos... No, I got to charge more. I got to say a Chris Black one-minute cameo, 30-second cameo, $50 to $75.

Yeah, that's too high. You're not famous enough. No shade, but you can't be charging more than Ryan Cabrera. But see, I think I can, actually. Right, but I don't think you're going to get three people a year for $75. Yeah, you might be right. Damn, maybe I should get you a Ryan Cabrera cameo for your birthday. That's a good-ass idea. Look, is Whitney on there? She wouldn't do that. Honestly, I feel like I can get to Whitney and get a personal message without using Big Cameo. Let her know. I won't share it on socials. I won't post it on my Facebook. It's just for me. It's just for me. I just want to feel Whitney's love. Oh, man. Wow. Also, lastly, thanks to everyone for ordering. a hat they did sell out and we are ordering more in a new colorway and they should be available soon yeah uh we got all kinds of shit coming for you losers oh yeah we got some new t-shirts coming too honestly the t honestly the shirt is tj i don't like to gas you up because i actually hate you deep down but some of your finest work yes thank you A true stroke of genius, honestly. And you do come to those once maybe every five, six years. So I hope that you're able to refuel and get ready for 2025. Every five or six. So this fun t-shirt that we're going to sell, that's my one good idea for this six-year period. So I have to wait until 2026 until I get a new one. That's why this partnership is so stressful for me is I have to have all the good ideas. Chris, without you, I am nothing. Thank you. Thank you for noticing that, and I think that the listeners would agree. TJ? Yeah, okay. It's time to go now. Always a pleasure to chat with you for public consumption. I have to say, I'm glad we did a little mental health check. I think it's been a while since we've done that. Check in on your players. You know what I'm saying?

Check in on your players, and if you go to BOA or if you were a BOA regular before quarantine, please let us know what your favorite order is. If you work at BOA right now and you listen to this podcast, we'll be back if you call us. Bang my DMs. Bang my DMs. I can't pay for TJ's martini. It's going to break me. Okay, bye, guys. Bye.